need your opinion.

[Caine]

This is weird but thought I needed to hear it from another angle.

 

The other day I was sitting on the sofa, the dog was next to me and my mum was then next to him. She leant over to hug the dog (in my direction) and just rested her arm on my leg, then she sat up, then leaned over to cuddle the dog again, and had her arm resting on my nuts, So I moved and had had a winge at her because I felt uncomfortable.

 

Smy mum said my sister didn't really like phisical contact with her and neither did I and it was weird. I said I don't know why I was like that, but it's true.

I don't like my mum touching me and neither does my sister.

 

We had pleny of love and affection from her when we were kids and it was fine, but now she just seems too touchy for my sister and I.

 

I had a thought, and matbe this is me just taking things too far, but I thought what if she touched us when we were kids but we don't remember, but now we're older it's like we don't like her near us.

 

I know this may seem way out there and i'm probably just being paranoid, but can't understand why I don't like her touching me, even if it's her feet slipping down the sofa a little and coming into contact with my leg or feet.

[Hope75]

Do you think she intentionally put her hand on your testicles?

[BeStrongBeHappy]

How old are you? Some mothers don't get that their children are growing up and do NOT want the same level of physical contact they had with them when they were younger children because it feels too sexual to them when they are teenagers etc.

 

She should DEFINITELY not be touching any part of you that you do not want her too, especially your private parts, so if she does, tell her to stop it, that is makes you uncomfortable. If she is a normal Mum, she may joke about it, but will stop because she respects you and realizes you are no longer a baby and that makes you uncomfortable.

 

If she doesn't stop, then I'd talk to a counselor at school or someone else you trust if you think she is trying to molest you or your sister. But i would only do that if she does something really inappropriate, or refuses to stop when you ask her to.

 

btw, hugs etc. are normal, but anything that goes beyond that, she needs to respect your privacy, especially if you are a teenager.

[Caine]

Well believe it or not, i'm 29, lol. I recently moved back home after a break up, there's probably nothing in it, it just makes me uncomfortable being touched by her.

For instance if we're sitting on the sofa, and she goes to get up, well you put tour hands down on the sofa or something to push yourself up, sometimes she might slap her hand down on my leg and push herself up. it's probably just playfull behaviour, but I just don't want her to touch me.

[avman]

Well at 29 I think just having a direct talk with her is the way to go.

 

Don't be accusing or nasty about it. Just tell her that you aren't comfortable being touched like when she braces herself to get up from the sofa. If she's trying to cuddle the dog and get up from the couch those are incidental contacts. But just tell her directly that you don't know why, but you are uncomfortable being touched.

 

I do tend to think the contact has all been accidental and innocent given what you have described.

[BeStrongBeHappy]

well, you're an adult then, but you're also living in her house... is she doing it so often it really upsets you, and is it worth upsetting her about by talking about it...

 

if you're getting free rent and her touch is harmless, then i'd just suck it up and recognize that maybe she still sees you as her baby boy, especially if you've returned to her house...

[Caine]

yeah you're probably right guys, thanks for the advice.