Best Friend Betrayal

[JoJo90814]

My best friend of 4 years has more recently become close to my sister. I recently discussed things with my best friend about my sister that were bothering me and she told my sister everything. I am so pissed at her and hurt. I want to cut the relationship completely because I feel betrayed. SHouldnt you be able to tell your best friend a bad thing about you sister without worrying that she is going to tell your sister or visa versa?

[Sugar-Rush]

Your best friend should never have betrayed your trust like that, but are you really ready to throw the towel in on the friendship, maybe talk to her, ask her why and tell her how hurt you are.

Sugs

xxx

[DizzyDoris]

Sorry but you dont own your friend. My mum always taught me if you have nothing nice to say dont say anything at all. It sounds a bit selfish that you would badmouth your sister to her,knowing this girl is her friend too. How uncomfortable would you feel in that situation?

 

Next time if you have issues with anyone,bite the bullet and be direct, tell THEM what the problem is, instead of bad mouthing them behind their back.

 

Looks like you found out the hard way that saying/doing nasty things has a bad way of coming back and biting you on the bum.

[Jonboy582]

You sure you friend was not trying to rectify these problems you had with your sister?

 

In my experience, I won't have best friends because others get jealous, and it will hurt more when one betrays you and there will always be a time in your life when this does happen. Also if there is something I want to tell someone I will not tell anyone at all if it can come back to me, hence why I post on this forum, and if I do tell someone I will make sure they have no link to the person i.e. I wont tell anyone who has a friend who knows the person in concern.

 

As for your friend, I suggest discussing things with her, and in future don't put her in a situation where her interests between two friends conflict.

 

 

 

Jon

[JoJo90814]

Hi Thanks for all of your replies.

 

You know sometimes you have frustrations with people in your life and you need to talk about it with someone other than that person.

 

My whole dilema was that my best friend and sister had become close and were leaving me out. I feel like my sister has done this over and over again in my life -with guys I have liked etc. I dont think she does it on purpose - I think it is who she is. Why should i have to put up with that? I shouldnt.

Ive told my sister over and over again and it doesnt make a difference. Why cant she find her own life?

 

Anyways I am moving away to go to school and I really think this is going to be great for me to be far and have a separate life from my sister.

 

As for my best friend, she made a choice. She chose my sister. She chose to betray me when I specifically asked her not to talk about it with my sister. how can I ever trust her again?

 

Think about if your family member did this to you, you talked to her about it in the recent past, it got worse, so you talked to your dearest most trusted friend about it, because, crap shes your best friend and you should be able to tell her anything(and you truly have trust and faith in her).....and the next day she spills it all to your sister.

[now_better]

yeah, i would feel totally betrayed if my best friend did likewise. the best friends are great listeners that just listen to whine for hours and sometimes give simple reflections. i'm lucky that i have one of those... someone you can really trust. i'm a pretty forgiving person, but if my best friend did likewise as your friend, i would be disappointed and definitely not be as open as i was before. if you feel that you can't recover your friendship, i guarantee you that you will make more friends in college. in fact, all my close friends i have today are pretty much from my college.

[HellFrost666]

Sorry but you dont own your friend. My mum always taught me if you have nothing nice to say dont say anything at all. It sounds a bit selfish that you would badmouth your sister to her,knowing this girl is her friend too. How uncomfortable would you feel in that situation?

 

Next time if you have issues with anyone,bite the bullet and be direct, tell THEM what the problem is, instead of bad mouthing them behind their back.

 

Looks like you found out the hard way that saying/doing nasty things has a bad way of coming back and biting you on the bum.

 

Um, do you have ciblings dizzydorris? I have ciblings. Sometimes they annoy me, and I have confided in others about this. There is a difference between confiding in someone and all out badmouthing. It sounds to me like all she did was confide.

 

Don't tell me you have never done this... be it about a cibling or someone else in your life.

 

Sorry but I just had to say something. With a holier then thou post like this someone would have said something eventually.

[TheRedQueen]

My best friend of 4 years has more recently become close to my sister. I recently discussed things with my best friend about my sister that were bothering me and she told my sister everything. I am so pissed at her and hurt. I want to cut the relationship completely because I feel betrayed. SHouldnt you be able to tell your best friend a bad thing about you sister without worrying that she is going to tell your sister or visa versa?

 

Absolutely!!! I sense a conflict of interest here, that really sucks, I'm sorry. I have two sisters, and one best friend. I confide in my sisters when I am having problems with my best friend, and confide in my best friend when I'm having problems with my sisters.