Think I've been dumped. Stupid Text messages!

[CharmedphoenixRising]

That's it then. I've been very unceremoniously dumped via a TEXT message before we could even have "the talk".

I guess it's good. But it hurts like hell, it really hurts.

 

He said he was coming back Saturday, and on Friday night he said "ooh looks like I won't be back, see you Sunday". So on Saturday I'm asking him dude, what's the plan and all that, and he doesn't reply, so I finally got all edgy and sent him a text saying "yo, could you answer your phone or call me or something, what's up with this no reply thing?"

 

And he decided to text back, within 10minutes, asking what the hell's my problem, what's with the attitude, and he doesn't walk to talk to me anymore 'cos of my attitude. I guess it's good that it's all done with then, it's been a roller coaster up down, my moods have been so shot 'cos of him.

 

But man, it really hurts so much

[Celadon]

Ohh, so sorry to hear that, CharmedPhoenixRising. That's really low of him to end your relationship throught TXT messaging. If that's all the respect he can muster for someone who cares for him, then I think you're better off without him. (I'm sorry, I know maybe you don't want to hear that right now, but I think you deserve better than that.)

 

Take care of yourself for now. Treat yourself well and try to keep busy, so your mind doesn't think about it. Go hang out with girlfriends. I've been there, and it's no picnic, but after a little bit, you'll find yourself feeling better. Ya just gotta get through this break-up phase first. Hang in there!

[robowarrior]

I think your blowing things out of proportion , can't see you on saterday see you on sunday. Do you really have to police interrogate him to the extend as you did over one lousy day? Besides who says its over, you just made him angry, maby he'll call later. Honestly think you are overreacting here.

 

What you need to understand is that a relationship is all about being together, but also enabling the other to do their own thing.

 

So give your partner some slack space to breathe, its like a dog on a leash , hold it too short and the dog will suffocate, hold it to long and the dog will run away, moderation is the key to a good relationship. Its good that your checking him out, but don't become a victim of the paranoid.

[CharmedphoenixRising]

Thanks Katie & thanks Robo

 

Can't get him out of my head - you know the saying "don't go to sleep angry stay up and fight?" that's my style.

 

Anyway, yea, sure I cut him slack and all that. And got to half explain my point that all i wanted to know was what time i was going to meet him on Sunday, i didn't give attitude. Anyway, he finally said apology accepted, but yea, i know space. It's a relatively LD thing anyway, so ya know? I'd appreciate not being strung on and hopeful for a nice weekend, without anything concrete.

 

Anyway. Yuppers. Space is given.

[ZoeMatthews]

Anyway. Yuppers. Space is given.

 

Wow, isn't that the truth?

 

Do you think he might be seeing someone else?

 

With my ex (we are back together now and I am dealing with other issues), I found out that he broke up with me because he wanted to date someone else.

 

He started out by being really cold towards me, he would not call me, etc. Finally, when I confronted him, he said he didn't love me anymore and that he wanted some space....it hurt like hell...

 

Take care of yourself...go out with friends for now.

 

Try not to think about this and move on with your life

 

Love

 

Zoe

[jazzgirrl]

Wow, isn't that the truth?

 

Take care of yourself...go out with friends for now.

 

Try not to think about this and move on with your life

 

 

I agree. Chances are, he'll come back around. Many do.

[Celadon]

Yeah, don't go to sleep angry - - that's my style too, CPR. And I understand the frustration about him wanting his needs taken care of, but screw yours. If a guy doesn't fight fair, I have no use for him. If I bring it to his attention and he doesn't give a damn, then I've got my answer.

 

My ex wanted to do things his way all the time. Then when I'd ask to do something I wanted to do, he'd pout and throw a tantrum. I can still hear him now: "How come we always do what YOU want to do?"

 

Believe me, some men -- or rather, boys -- you are BETTER OFF without.

[CharmedphoenixRising]

thanks girls. It's really helped. this weekend has been REALLY long due to bank holidays & everything, so it's been a little harder.

I really doubt he'll be coming back, I mean how long does it take a guy to get over being angry??

Yea, he could be seeing someone else, I don't know. He said he still had a spark for his ex. And considering how easy it was for him to say "he doesn't want to talk to me" doesn't exactly give much hope.

 

Thing is - I don't even know why I like him, I know I've gotta move on. All friends seem to want to ask about him, because he seemed like such a great guy *shrugs*

 

I'm actually happy to be back at work today.

[Celadon]

I really doubt he'll be coming back, I mean how long does it take a guy to get over being angry?? ...Thing is - I don't even know why I like him, I know I've gotta move on. All friends seem to want to ask about him, because he seemed like such a great guy *shrugs*

 

I'm actually happy to be back at work today.

 

Good CPR! I'm glad you're back at work and distracted from thinking about it. Yeah, I dated one of those "he seems like such a great guy" men. Some people just have split personalities. In public they're funny, charming, lovable, kind. In private, their baggage comes out and gets dumped on YOU.

 

I used to do the whole thing with "how do I handle his anger"? I finally realized he used it as a weapon, as a power trip, putting me on pins and needles. I finally said to he** with that.

 

One thing: Don't let anyone tell you that "if you had only handled him this way" or "if you'd only done that" he would still be with you. It's BS! First, that's a rude thing to say. Second, it's not true. A man will be faithful according to his own character. And that character shows 24/7; it's not a fake front that is shown sometimes to some people.

 

Keep on keepin' on!

[CharmedphoenixRising]

Thank you so much everybody.

It's been over a week, and i bumped into him online (so he didn't block me *lol* maybe i am paranoid)

And I was definitely more collected when talking to him (of course he being a guy had the "I don't want to hurt you because I care about you")

 

But I'm also feeling much stronger emotionally, to distance myself from him, and if he wants to go out for dinner/ drinks/ movie, that's great. If he doesn't, that's fine too, and we'll take it (i'll take it) very slowly, and see how it goes. But I won't tolerate being treated like a doormat.

(plus I mean if you're 33 & a guy - get a grip on your emotions man!)