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It's been two days and the tears have finally stopped


cingar
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I can't believe I cried for nine full days . I finally did go to the doctor to get help . I was losing weight. I finally got scared enough to go I talked to a friend of mine she thought I was being silly that I had never had my heart broken before. my first husband was an abusive man who did everything imaginable to me so when I finally got the nerve to leave I was more relieved then heart broken. And when Lpg came along , he showed me how a man was suppose to treat a woman. I honestly didn't know it could be like that. I fell and I fell hard.So when he broke up with me last week I honestly thought I was gonna die. the pain just wouldn't go away. So thats why I went to the doctor to get help. What ever the medication is it's working it is actually starting to numb the pain. And I've been able to start eating again. I think ranting on this thread thing has actually helped to get the feelings out there even if no one ever reads this, it keeps my mind busy. I'm still sad but it's not as bad as it was. My children have never seen there mom so upset before after all Lpg was moms first boyfriend in six years since the divorce. I tried to hide it from them but sometimes it would just come out and couldn't stop it. I deffinitly wouldn't of made it through with out them. as well as the encouraging words from complete strangers telling me your not alone you will pull though this. Thanks for all those listeners.

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cingar, i looked at your previous post and this one and it made me sad. i remember when i was where you were a few months ago and it was the hardest time in my life. driving home from work and just randomly crying on the freeway. lying in bed and tears just trickling down my face. praying that this was a bad dream and that i would wake up. i remember talking to my friend and feeling so helpless. there wasn't nothing i could do, nothing more i could give, i was just me and it wasn't enough. and if i didn't have such good friends and family that surrounded me and cared about me, my will to live would have completely evaporated.

 

but life gets better in some ways. i think i stopped obsessively thinking about her about 2 months after i did NC. and now, i think about her on occasion, but not very often anymore.

 

i think NC, continue to surround yourself with good people, spend time with your kids, rebuild your confidence, enjoy hobbies and life again. that will help you recover and it might take some time (some days, you will feel like utter crap, i will not lie). just keep your head up.

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Cingar,

I'm glad you're doing better. I on the other hand still cry everyday about her... I was told that I was the man every woman would want as a husband, she said when she asked GOD to give her a husband, what I have was exactly what she asked for and more even but yet, I don't know how it got so crazy between us that she says she still has something to figure out... she's doesn't feel the love... she never has. It hurts as hell because we had our engagement planned, wedding, everything... I loved her to death and gave my 110% to her. sorry I'm just venting but if you found anything that helps you get through this don't forget to post it here so people like us that are hurting can read and know about it.

 

Take care

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