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How long did you date before getting married?

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I've been dating my girl for around 3 years now, and i'm starting to consider proposing. i'm 24, and she's 21... and she's been hinting that she'd like to get married when she finishes school haha...


How long did you date before settling down and getting married? Also, what is the average cost of an engagement ring? 2 months salary or something?

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Met 9/30/01 after chatting online and on the phone for a few weeks, he proposed a week later (with a ring he bought for less than $100 3 days after our first date) and we got hitched 7/3/02.


Our wedding rings (like these: link removed) cost a little over $100 for the pair of 'em.


We paid $40 for the marriage license and $20 to the minister at the courthouse.


No big wedding, no months of planning, no huge bills for catering, flowers, a hall, a band, a dress, tux rental, etc. Just as married as couples who spend as much as I make in a year.


My point is that "two months salary" guideline was set up by jewelers...guess what their primary goal is? (Hint: it's not you or your future bride's happiness...it has everything to do with their bottom line.)

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This is a little off track, but it goes with S2S, helpme2 and Dako's 'weddings for cheap' theme.


When my mom and dad got married (in 1970) she borrowed a wedding dress. They had their reception in the basement of the church for free. They paid 10$ for tea sandwhiches and punch for everyone, had handpicked flowers for centerpieces (free),her grandmother played the piano for entertainment (free), friends took poloroids of the great event (free) and the rings were less than 30$ for the pair of 'em.


36 years and 4 grown kids later, they are still happily married.

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wow sweet i'd love to spend less than $500 on a wedding hehe... although I don't think my girl and her family would like that idea.


Well, if they're picking up the tab, sometimes you have to go along to get along.


However, when it comes to anything you have to pay for, I'd suggest holding the line in regards to your budget and what you can afford. Do not allow a wedding service provider, family, friends or your fiance to put you into debt.


Being fiscally responsible is something that will ensure marital bliss more than having a fairy tale wedding.

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i don't think there is a prescribed "how long" period to make the big marriage decision... it's all about how you feel and if it is right for you guys.


sounds like you guys are good to go! seriously, though. do you see yourself growing old with this girl?? can you guys work on problems well? are you in love?? those sort of things seem like they matter more than a calander...


as for the costs... i agree to let her family deal with the costs if she wants a 'big deal' wedding. that part is typically the bride's call, and if they can afford it and want it, you pretty much have to go along for the ride if you want to!


and for the ring... is there some dollar amount that she expects? that would certainly put a damper on things... but if not, i would find something beautiful, affordable, and special.


good luck!!

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We dated for 2 and a half months. Of course, we had been very close friends for over 2 years at that point, so we pretty much knew each other. Plus, we had premarital counseling.


Our rings (my engagement ring and wedding band, and his wedding band) cost around $2400 altogether... but we got especially high-quality diamonds in platinum settings from a place that doesn't use slave labor. You could do it like we do in the South and run on over to the local WalMart and get you an engagement ring for $200. Weddings really can be done cheaply, as the poster above said. I would never have spent more than $10K on my wedding, and I really only spent around $5K. I've never really cared about a giant fancy wedding, and after seeing my sister go through the "everything has to be perfect!!!!!!!" planning of her own wedding, I'm REALLY glad mine was as informal as it was.

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really only 100 bucks on the rings?


we got our rings at the pawn shop, apparenlty someone else didn't want them anymore. I didn't have an engagement ring but we were only engaged for like a week so it seemed like a waste of money.


The set I think was $90 or something plus tax. They look like link removed but the diamonds are smaller and closer together, they sparkle a lot though so they are pretty. We had to get mine resized but the jewler charged less than $10 to do it, and cleaned them both for free.


My husband's cousin is a minister and he married us in the park for free, it was beautiful.

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We dated for 2 and a half months. Of course, we had been very close friends for over 2 years at that point, so we pretty much knew each other. Plus, we had premarital counseling.



I have to second the premarital counseling, it's the best investment you can make before the wedding, ours was free from a local church, but I think it really has made our marriage that much stronger.

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Sorry to go off topic but Hope the dog in your avatar is absolutely adorable!!! I have a yellow lab and there is NO way she would let me put that outfit on her!! haha!!!


LOL yeah Lady Bugg, I thought it was sooo cute but she thought she was being punished! See how sad she looks, lol! Poor pup!


My sister is one of those who will die trying to have the huge wedding. She and her fiance are pretty broke and yet they are going all out for this huge wedding that is going to cost about 15K... when they do not yet have a place to live... both have lousy credit....his car is falling apart... I just don't understand it myself. My bf and I already have a beautiful house....both college educated and he makes (and in 2 months when I graduate! I will be making) decent salaries... but we still will probably go frugally.


I just don't see the point of spending all that money on a huge extravagant party. Like S2S said, we'll be just as married as anyone who spent a fortune... and we could use the money towards an addition on the house, or college education for our kids...

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