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missing him today...


r3drobin
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its been about 2 months....woa, this is the first time realizing how long its been....2 months since he said goodbye to me for good and we've been 100% NC. he's long gone i suppose...although physically 2 miles down the road. i assume i dont run into him becuz he spends his time w/her now...she lives further away in a city i never have really visited and dont know very well.

 

anyway today was a beautiful day weather wise...a real change for TX...and i found myself thinking about our motorcycle rides and days gone by. im not sure if i was missing him or just missing the "thought of him/us"...but i found myself searching his website this evening. ouch ](*,)

 

i cried...i thought about him too much...i called a friend. i tried talking about how bad he used to make me feel during our relationship...how unhappy i was. i tried to put it into perspective and let it go. its just hard. i guess im just lonely. the season is changing...holidays are coming....and this year not only do i not have my boyfriend, i dont have my mother. (passed away suddenly in march) i wish i could skip this time in my life and jump forward to good times... now please. [-o

 

thx for listening.

robin

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"im not sure if i was missing him or just missing the "thought of him/us"..."

u can think of him and u in both of those ways...it doesn't have to be one or the other

 

"i cried...i thought about him too much...i called a friend. i tried talking about how bad he used to make me feel during our relationship...how unhappy i was"

did u think about how happy u were too? try and give balance to your thoughts and u might feel a little better. i am sure if u are thinking about him - he is thinking about u...sounds like u had a nice bond. hugs

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yeah i am with you and glad to know you are in your thirties too as this is my second breakup and not as hard as the first but i think idid the right thing he tried to hug me before i left and i said no he said he needed time but if he aint ready to commit after 5 yars he never will be - right ? so i wonder lonely as a cloud again - i miss his laugh his smell and this is day one i cry i thought i would have him to be mine always but he got scared when i got ready and he thought he was ready before an then got scared - so what to do ! I love him! right so me going to find new hobby and friends>

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