HELP me get out of this horrible relationship.

[LovinIt]

I am going through a breakup/still in this relationship, that is killing me. He treats me, so horribly, that I don't know where to turn.

 

After many posts in the past, I have yet another story. Its so hard to sum everything up, so you all can see exactly what has happened, but I will try, so you dont have to go back and read my other posts.

 

I met this man back in January, we worked together. He cheated and broke up with his girlfriend of 2 1/2 years to be with me. After their breakup, a month or so down the road, I asked if he would like to be official. He said he wasnt ready but he was committed to me fully. I let it go. Another month goes by, I ask again. He still isnt ready. I find out he lies to me about hanging out with the ex,however I do not believe he messed around on me with her. So, 5 more months go by, he still doesnt want to committ to me. I think that sucks. He told me that he was giving me all the love he could give at that time.

I stuck with him, figuring that eventually he would come around, and just really truly love me. Another month goes by, and I'm feeling as if this man I love does not really love me. He was saying nasty things to me, treating me like I was expendable, and not giving me the things I longed for the most. JUst some love and affection. So I cheated. With one of our co workers. This man wanted to spend time with me, he wanted to hold me, he would have done anything for me. I knew it was wrong, but my heart was hurting so much from the guy I was dating, that I wanted to make it go away.

 

Well, my man found out through some text messages on my phone. He told me he is done, and that he loved me, and couldnt believe after everything hes given me that I would do this. Wait, given me what?? A hard time? Telling me that if he cant hang out with his friends, that he will have time for me?

 

I cried, I begged, I pleaded, to get him back. A week after it all went down I got fired from that job, relating to that. My man was devastated. He decided that he wanted to be there for me, and that no matter what he would try to make things work with us. So things were good, for three weeks. I finally found a new job, and him and I seemed to be, getting stronger, and closer than ever.

 

A little less than a week ago, him and i went out. We had a great time. We got home, I was looking throuhg his phone, IN FRONT OF HIM, as a sort of joke, since obviously we all have trust issues now. He picks up mine, and starts digging into me asking who this one guy is. This guy is a friend, and I hung out with him a few times, but did not tell my man, because i knew he would get on my case, and start telling me how no one is really my friend, and he's never heard of this guy, and how I befriend people too fast and yadda yadda. So we get into a fight about that, and then he sayes...if I find out that you had sex with the guy you cheated on me with in the future, I will never be with you again.

 

So here I am feeling guilty because I did not tell him I had sex with this guy. I worry and worry, so the next day I come home from school, and lay it out for him. I tell him, because I want things to be good with us.

 

He leaves, I dont talk to him. I go to work the next day, get fired from a SECOND JOB, and right after that I call him, he tells me hes sorry but he doesnt think things will work out. I cry, I get wasted, I think its the end of the world. That same night he comes over, we have been doing it practically every day since then. He still sees no future for us, and now, he's all, "we can be friends, buddies." Im telling him Im not comfortable with being called a buddy yet. Hes like, why not BUDDY, whats wrong BUDDY, whats wrong with being a BUDDY. This man is evil. When i cry, and ask him if he still loves me, he tells me that i should stop asking him grade school questions, and if I need to aks more questions, that he needs to know how many in advance and he can decide if he wants to take a nap in the middle of them. EXCUSE ME, but i do NOT deserve to be treated like a piece of crap. If you want the truth, I may have cheated, and trust me, I payed my dues, I felt bad, Ill never do it again. but he has hurt me over the last 9 months more than i have ever hurt him. I need to be out of this. He is not good for me, but how can i take these steps.

Listen, I love him, I know how things can be, but, I dont think things will ever be ok. SOmetimes, I see what i saw in him, last night, he was being all, honey, oh baby, ok honey, blah blah. Then, the next phone call is like, welp see ya later. He has problems, and I do to. HELP ME GET OUT. I need to move on.

[Dako]

Harsh words ahead.

 

So what do you want?

I read your post twice, and can't understand why any rational person would be in such a soap opera unless they enjoy the drama.

If the guy treats you like crap, leave him.

[kellbell]

Hey there,

 

"EXCUSE ME, but i do NOT deserve to be treated like a piece of crap."

 

Um, you are letting him treat you like this by taking him back and begging and pleading him to be with you. People will treat you as you ALLOW them to treat you. You are LETTING him to treat you like crap my friend. Get rid of him!

 

Ignore his calls, start NC ASAP. Hang out with your friends, work out, engage in your interests. Start looking out for YOU.

[beaglelover_06]

I must admit that after reading this, it almost seems like a one of those tv talk shows...I won't say which one but it does. I think that you should not even consider wanting to be in a relationship with him or to even talk to him anymore. I would cut all ties with him. NO guy should be talking to you like that no matter if you had done something wrong like cheating. He is just toying with you in being nice to you one day and then treating you like crap on another. He knows that you still have feelings for him and he is just PLAYING with your emotions. Stay away from him and don't communicate with him anymore.

 

Good luck!