not picking up

[iamconfused5302]

Hi there,

 

I have been ignoring calls and texts and starting to feel bad now from a girl that im dating for couple of months. The reason why i gave her the no contact thing is because obv i like her and she still talks to her ex bf. so she has been calling me and texting me alot. telling me that she is being distant from ex bf and that he is moving on. today, she texted me saying,"how come im not picking up the phone? why am i mad?

 

Thanks

[DN]

Did you tell her why you were going nc in the first place?

[iamconfused5302]

so she can sort out her feelings about her ex.

[ElektraHere]

well perhaps you should let her in on your NC, otherwise it isnt helping her is it??? NOPE!!

[rose2summer]

If you weren't in a relationship with her, then I think NC isn't really fair.

 

Tell her first that you are following NC because you want her to relieve her feelings from her ex.

 

Just dropping her isn't really being respectable.

[Fisch]

I agree, communicate, at least let her know that you are trying to give her space and/or that you also want bussiness with her ex to be resolved before you engage in anything. Anyway, how long has it been since they broke up and you got together, and how long were they together, do you think she is ready for a relationship?

[chai714]

iamconfused,

 

If you want to drop her altogether and never talk to her again and be confused, then continue ignoring her calls.

 

If you want to give her more time to get over her ex, reduce (not eliminate) your contact with her. Doing NC with her will make her feel bad either about herself or you. There isn't a reason she should feel bad about herself and you certainly don't want her to have negative feelings toward you. So, it's ok to talk to her every now and then. Remember, put her on the back burner for now and let simmer. It's all about keeping doors open.

[NJRon]

This is the girl that keeps waffling. Have you TOLD her you are broken up?

 

I am confused also. What is your intention with this girl?

 

Breaking up by just not calling again is not good.

 

You can end this confusion by saying, "I'm not mad. We are broken up. I don't want to hear from you again, but i hope you have a nice life."

 

She is unstable and toxic. Move along my friend.

 

Give NC not for her to get over her ex... do it for you.

 

However, if you want her drama in your life, then yes, the appropriate way would be to follow chai's advice. As just shutting her off is going to leave her wondering what the heck is going on.. not moving forward with anything.

 

That's your choice though. Either way, I think you need to do something to stop this one way or the other. Her head may pop off.

[iamconfused5302]

they have been together for 2 yrs and they have broken up for 7 months or so.

they both of feelings for each other.

[heloladies21]

Now is the time where you can let her through, listen to her explain her situation, and then decide if you believe her that she's moved on from her ex. If it sounds legit then you can start working at things again, but if it still smells fishy, then tell her what you think and why. If you keep ignoring her, she's just gonna think you're angry at her.