How do I get over this :(

[STARSHINE42]

So, Sunday night as I left to go to my boyfriends house, Dylan, my kitty ran outside. I never really liked him out at night but it's been really nice out latley so I let him go outside. As I got into my car the sprinklers went on and he ran by the front door. I think he wanted to go back in but I was in a rush and figured my mom would let him in when she got home.

 

Monday morning...I come home and Dylan wasn't there. He always waited for me on the stoop in the morning. I live on a small dead end in a condo complex. He has never left the block. So I walked up and down the block calling for him. ..no answer. I was a little worried, but I figured he was around. I went to the beach came back around 7pm and still no Dylan. So I took my car up and down the whole niehborhood calling for him. I was really starting to get worried bc it was not like him to leave like that. People kept reasurring me cat's will do that sometimes, leave for a couple of days and come back. But I knew something was wrong. I looked for him all night. I made lost signs and my boyfriend said to wait until tuesday to put them up.

So tues day morning he still wasn't around I went looking everywhere. I drove in circles for hours. I went to the beach with my friend and came back around 4pm.

 

She dropped me off and I went around my block calling for him. All of a sudden I hear his cry. I start frantically looking for him and there he was! I saw him inside this fence. it was black fences with the wires and spies on top. I have no idea how he got in there but I started panicing because there was no way I could get him out. My niehbor went around and tried to get in but couldnt reach him. There was all wires and vines inside the fence. so my bf rushed over and dove in the fence and got him out.

 

He was not good..I rushed him to the vet and well he had broken his legs, and his spine, and half his body was cut open no fur. and the vet said maggots had taken over his body. There was 0% chance for him to live.

 

So I had to put him to sleep. He was so scared and in so much pain. He did not deserve this. He was only 8 months old, and I loved him so much. He had his whole life ahead of him. I can't help but blame myself for not letting him in on sunday when he ran to the door. And for not finding him sooner

[lady00]

I'm so sorry to hear that. It sounds like you really cared for your cat and I'm sure it was hard for you to see him suffering like that. I don't know what to say except it's something that will take time to get over. What happened to him is not your fault and blaming yourself won't help you feel better about the whole thing. I'm sorry I can't offer better advice but I know that losing a pet can be traumatic and all I can say is give it time.

[Scout]

Oh, hon, I am so, so sorry this has happened. Big, big hugs. I understand you are really traumatized, and I understand you feel responsible, but you know if you had any idea this would happen, you would have prevented it. It's awful, I know, but this is not your fault. It's just one of those terrible things that happens sometimes.

 

If it's any comfort, I doubt that he was in pain for the entire time, especially if his spine was broken, because the nerve center would have been "shut off" at some point.

 

Let yourself grieve, but please try to move past the guilt. This was not your fault.

 

And maybe it would make you feel better if you volunteered at an animal shelter, or a cat rescue organization. You may think it will make you feel worse, but trust me, you will be doing so much good for animals that need it, and knowing that will help you feel so much better.

[PRSOV]

You did the right thing for your kitten, you took away his pain.

 

Don't blame yourself under the circumstances, it was just one of those spare of the moment decisions, nothing you could have done could have saved him because if you did I am sure you would have done it.

 

Reflect on the positive memories you have of you and your kitty.

[Scout]

And another thing...you tirelessly looked for your kitten when you discovered he was missing, you didn't give up until you found him! You weren't just sitting around going, "oh well, he'll show up when he feels like it!" That is a hell of a lot more than many other people would have done (sadly).

 

YOU WERE A WONDERFUL PET OWNER.

 

PRSOV is right, you found him in the end and got him the care he needed. Sweetie, I know it's an awful blow and you'll struggle with it for a while, but please, please don't forget that in the end, you FOUND him and got him taken care of immediately. You didn't give up. If I ever come back in this life as a cat or dog, I hope I have a loving owner like YOU ARE.

 

Again, hugs, hugs, hugs.

[BellaDonna]

I am so sorry to hear that. You must be so upset. I love animals dearly and I know how much it hurts to lose a pet.

 

It's not your fault. Cats love to go outside. I had a cat that went outside for 17 years and never had one bad thing happen to her. What happened to poor Dylan was just really bad luck. You had no idea it would happen and when you let him out, you expected him to come back like he always does. You didn't do anything wrong. Please don't be so hard on yourself.

 

You were with him in his last moments, and you found him, so I'm sure that gave him some comfort. You did all you could do. Dylan is in peace now.

 

link removed

 

 

BellaDonna

[Dako]

Sorry about this sad accident.

I hope when you think of Dylan, you reamember his life, not his end. All pets don't live long, but they give their all. We should do the same.

[coollady1957]

STARSHINE42,,,,, I am so so very sorry for the loss of your cat. It is truly difficult to have to put them to sleep. I agree that is it NOT your fault. Cats do love the outdoors, and usually do come back. It is very unfortunate that your Dylan met with some accident while outdoors. I have had to put a cat to sleep before that met with an accident as well, and I can truly sympathize with your pain and sorrow.

 

I am a cat lover myself and have five of my own, two of which go in and out all the time. They LOVE it outdoors, and have a blast chasing bugs, running and playing. I am aware that each time I let them out to play and have fun that there is a level of risk that something could happen. But being outdoors is something that cats dearly love.

 

The poem Rainbows Bridge that BellaDonna sent to you on the link, can be quite comforting. Remember the fun times and celebrate the joy you had while he was alive. Again ,I am so sorry .

[Beyondthesea]

Oh Star, your story brought tears to my eyes. I am so sorry about what happened.

 

This was not your fault, just bad luck. The poor little guy. You had no reason not to let him out, as you said it was nice and he normally sticks very close to home. In this situation, all of us would have done the same.

 

He's certainly at peace and doesn't blame you for what happened. I'm sure he loves you very much and is in no pain now.

 

BIG HUGS!