the ex wants me back now

[2900]

so i was in a relationship for 6 years and we broke up cuz he wasn't sure how he felt about me. ok so now it's 3 months later and we wants me back, despite the fact that i've "been with" other guys. i'm not really sure what i wanna do. i love the single life and the freedom. i don't really know how i feel about him anymore. i did tell him if he wanted me back, he'd have to really fight for me. but i don't wanna encourage him when i'm not even sure if i want him back or not. i know, in the end no one can decide but me, but i was hoping you guys could comment on my situation and give a little insight. what do u all think?

[DN]

I think telling him he has to fight for you was a mistake. Either you love him and want to be with him or you don't. No one should have to 'fight' for a partner - that puts the relationship out of balance and almost always dooms it to failure.

 

It was not wrong of him to be unsure and take a step back but if you don't want him then let him go - because any other course of action would be wrong.

[happyninja75]

if there are some feeling left with you for him i would say let him fight for. and then see if your still intrested. in my oppinion he needs to prove himself, and if he's willing to try let him. and then you will have to make up your mind if you want him back or not.

[blindreepr]

If you are unsure about your feelings and not willing to put 110 percent into the relationship its not worth going back to it.

[AwdreeHpburn]

I think DN said it - I suspect there was a reason for that statement to him but either way, I think its not too late to retract it.

 

I realize the difficulty of the decision. I think you do know what you want but feel a bit guilty about making it final. But that's just my opinion of course...

[BONO]

I think telling him he has to fight for you was a mistake. Either you love him and want to be with him or you don't. No one should have to 'fight' for a partner - that puts the relationship out of balance and almost always dooms it to failure.

 

It was not wrong of him to be unsure and take a step back but if you don't want him then let him go - because any other course of action would be wrong.

 

Bingo - again ! ( Sigh ) X

[saltwatergirl]

Bingo - again ! ( Sigh ) X

 

Here Here! Either Do or do not, there is no try.

 

Wait, did I just quote Yoda?!

 

Salt

[redhook]

If you are in your early twenties and unsure then you should run. Enjoy your new found freedom, but let him know you are not going to be getting back together. You owe him an explanation at least.

[Riley99]

If you do not know how you feel about him, then take it at your own pace. However, this happened to me - my ex broke up with me, then realized he wanted to be with me right when I started dating someone else. He fought for me - hard - and I fought back saying I needed time. Problem is is that I took too much time and it really affected him. That a brand new guy could make me think that hard about whether I wanted to be with him - so that really hurt him. My point is, try to think of whether you want to be with him in the long run. If you do, commit now. Otherwise, you will regret not doing so sooner like myself.