What does CONFIDENCE feel like?

[AwdreeHpburn]

For those of us who have none from those of you who do....

 

...what does being confident feel like?

 

I mean in terms of knowing you are good at something, making decisions, etc.?

 

I know its subjective and I'm not looking for speculation or what someone thinks confidence IS.

 

I'm wondering if someone with confidence, in any particular area, can describe what it feels like.

 

I asked my husband. He's a very confident guy. He said, "I dunno. I don't think about it. I just do what needs to be done."

 

Hmmmmmmm...Does that mean he doesn't second guess himself? What? Not very descriptive is it?

 

Ok -so what does it feel like to you?

[tylercdurden2004]

Hmmmmmmm...Does that mean he doesn't second guess himself? What? Not very descriptive is it?

 

Ok -so what does it feel like to you?

 

I am sure he second guesses himself. However he probably realizes decisions need to be made and just makes them. Second guessing I dont believe has anything to do with self-confidence however perseverating or focusing soley on whether the decision is right or wrong has more to do with lacking confidence. Confidence is making a decision and being able to live with the consequences. You can think about something until the proverbial cows come home, however making a decision is what matters ultimately.

[kellbell]

Tee,

 

That is a good question. My confidence varies. It depends on what is. For example, when it comes to talking to people and introducing myself, I am okay. I used to bartend and I interview people for a living so I feel at ease in that respect.

 

But the other day, I was asked to put together a PowerPoint presentation for my boss whom is doing a conference overseas in a few weeks. I was a little nervous and to be honest, felt a like I would not do a good job. But I got it done and he is very pleased with it.

 

I think confidence builds over time through experience and others helping you build it. Like with my boss, he helped me in that sense so next time when I am asked to do one, I will not feel as intimiated.

 

Some people are naturally confident, as it is their personality. Some people may have to build their confidence over time and through experience.

 

How does it feel? It feels safe, it feels right, and your gut is not screaming at you. That is how it feels for me personally.

[AntiLove_SuperStar]

When I have those wonderful phases when my depression burns off like the morning fog, I walk differently. I look everything, everyone in the eye, No Problem.

 

I know I am gorgeous.

 

I know I am intelligent.

 

I know when I lounge casually accross benches and busstop seats people look at me, and I see the attention as a bonus to my day.

 

I walk into my house and know I probably havn't done anything to upset my family, and I know that I can even go some way to making them happy.

 

I know I'm irreplaceable. I can learnt from everything. I can learn from everyone. There is nothing I can't handle. Pain may be inevitable, but the worst that can happen is that you collapse with effort - and recover.

 

That's my self-dialogue when I'm well. In other words, I now get around 1 day in 50 like that.

[easyguy]

When you're confident in social situations, you sometimes do things unconsciously; things that you would have otherwise had a hard time doing when you didn't have that confidence. It's about just doing it and not thinking about it. You also have high self esteem and feel like nothing can stop you, even if you fail at something. It's taking something that sometimes seems life-threatening, and turns it into something miniscule. But don't mistake that for arrogance.

[AwdreeHpburn]

Tee,

 

It feels safe, it feels right, and your gut is not screaming at you. That is how it feels for me personally.

 

 

OK - that paints a picture.

 

I think I'm a visual thinker.

 

And Antilove - as ususal, you are the master of verbal portraits....well done. I get it, from your persepective anyhow.

[BlueWolf]

That is a good question. For me, it feels like looking into the future and knowing everything will be fine. Sure things can change, but once you look ahead and think positive, you are more relaxed and outgoing.

It also feels like there is no intimidation from anything or anyone.

[AwdreeHpburn]

no intimidation huh??

 

Now THAT would feel nice....

[itsallgrand]

When I am confident, it feels like that wonderful time after an amazing lovemaking session. I am home. I am safe. I can see. I know I am fully capable of living - for the simple fact that I am alive in that moment and aware.

 

When I am confident, I feel like I did when I was a little girl. Curious, excited rather than anxious, and completely present.

[AwdreeHpburn]

and completely present.

 

 

 

wow! You guys are good.

 

Completely present...

 

...nice one itsallgrand.

[BlueWolf]

no intimidation huh??

 

Now THAT would feel nice....

 

I think I've learned (although I may be wrong) that pretty much all of us are human and are the same. There is no reason why you should allow anyone to give you a hard time.

As for material things - the things people say are too hard or impossible - I've heard it a lot of times and I've learned not to listen to that. My brother (who already went through high school) taught me that.

If anyone tells you something is too hard (something you haven't tried), it's pretty much BS.

[itsallgrand]

BlueWolf, that's a great way of putting it. It made me think of a statement an old art teacher of mine used to repeat to me when I would moan or show lack of confidence. It has got me through A LOT. I wanna share it:

 

It's not difficult, it's different.

 

That's it. What a perspective though, eh. It makes a world of difference.

[BlueWolf]

...But don't get me wrong.

I'm by no means perfect. I've tried things and failed just like anyone else. I've felt intimidated quite a bit also. Less now than before though.

 

[EDIT] Crosspost.

[AwdreeHpburn]

What a brilliant teacher! Good for her/him.

 

I like it. Sounds sort of like how my husband looks at the world.

 

Everything is a welcomed challenge and nothing is insurmountable...yeh, on top of confidence he's an optimist..go figure. I mean, how in the "H" "E" double hockey sticks did we EVER hook up??!!?

 

Oh, yeh, he said I have a nice bum (

[sir sirloin]

Confidence happens when there isn't any space between thought and action. When your body flows like a well-oiled machine powered by your will. When your mind isn't struggling against itself and empty of doubts, fears, or regrets. When you are able to focus on what you are doing to the point where the whole world melts away. It occurs at the point where you become an insturment of pure purpose.

[AwdreeHpburn]

wow.

 

 

I really like that sir sirloin. Spoken like a man familiar with the feeling.

[BlueWolf]

Confidence happens when there isn't any space between thought and action. When your body flows like a well-oiled machine powered by your will. When your mind isn't struggling against itself and empty of doubts, fears, or regrets. When you are able to focus on what you are doing to the point where the whole world melts away. It occurs at the point where you become an insturment of pure purpose.

 

Wow indeed.

That's an even better definition than the dictionary has!

[underdog]

i can use confidence boost im totally introverted and very shy person i get really really nervous like panic attack at parties or some people yep i get intimidated because of that i think you can say i m a loner sure it bothers me when i get like this but its not a big deal i m not that person that tries too hard to be someone else and is not

[renthead]

You know you've made a confident decision when you think it was the best choice you could've made. (There might be more to this, but I can't think right now.)

[Jorus Cbaoth]

Waking up in the morning and knowing that I'm one good looking son of a bi***.