Ross_K Posted May 23, 2006 Author Share Posted May 23, 2006 2Smart, there's no way I enjoy being miserable. And thanks for calling me honey - I kinda liked it!! Yeah sure, you're just saying that. Link to comment
Beyondthesea Posted May 23, 2006 Share Posted May 23, 2006 That's a nice picture of you Ross. Just had to jump in with that. Link to comment
tylercdurden2004 Posted May 23, 2006 Share Posted May 23, 2006 2Smart, there's no way I enjoy being miserable. Then get at 'er and do somehting about being miserable. I agree with 2Smart Shakur. No one lieks to be around miserable people, except maybe other miserable people. Its draining, tiring and overall unsatisfying. If you really want to change you will and not just talk about it. Link to comment
Ross_K Posted May 23, 2006 Author Share Posted May 23, 2006 Thanks darling. Oops, that was to beyondthesea. Link to comment
AwdreeHpburn Posted May 23, 2006 Share Posted May 23, 2006 I'm NOT just saying that. I like it. Its endearing and shows a certain level of confidence that you're willing to make me your honey I like it. Link to comment
shes2smart Posted May 23, 2006 Share Posted May 23, 2006 2Smart, there's no way I enjoy being miserable. Never said you were enjoying it...just that some people are content being that way...meaning comfortable. It's familiar. It may suck like a Hoover, but it's safe. They're too comfortable and familiar being miserable and too afraid of the unknown to do anything different. Link to comment
Ross_K Posted May 23, 2006 Author Share Posted May 23, 2006 Never said you were enjoying it...just that some people are content being that way...meaning comfortable. It's familiar. It may suck like a Hoover, but it's safe. They're too comfortable and familiar being miserable and too afraid of the unknown to do anything different. You could be right, trying to be positive and having hope just always seems to lead to soul crushing disappointments for me. Link to comment
shes2smart Posted May 23, 2006 Share Posted May 23, 2006 If you continually focus on the negative, that's all you will ever see. You could have the most amazing good fortune fall in your lap, but if you are bound and determined to find the negative, then you will deem that blessing a curse and call yourself unlucky. Link to comment
Dako Posted May 23, 2006 Share Posted May 23, 2006 I genuinely believe what makes some people comfortable is to find proof of their own shortcomings. It seems to vindicate their misery, and they also look for explanations of how the world is stacked against them. Easier than changing, but there's no future in it. Link to comment
Ross_K Posted May 23, 2006 Author Share Posted May 23, 2006 If you continually focus on the negative, that's all you will ever see. You could have the most amazing good fortune fall in your lap, but if you are bound and determined to find the negative, then you will deem that blessing a curse and call yourself unlucky. Nah that ain't true. Link to comment
AwdreeHpburn Posted May 23, 2006 Share Posted May 23, 2006 HEY - you just described my brother Dako!! He's totally like that. "Why does this keep happening to ME?" Its like, "dude. YOU are why...." Link to comment
tylercdurden2004 Posted May 23, 2006 Share Posted May 23, 2006 Ross At least 80-99% of the people on here and a good portion of them women, have told you being positive is attractive to women. That should be crystal. Until you become positive there is no real point in belabouring the issue of having a GF. The only way to find some positivity is to get out there and try things and fail and then succeed. I am not talking about dating I am talking about getting a job, going to school, playing sports, playing music etc etc whatever. You mentioned something about your mother that made me think she is overbearing and controlling. I have a few mates wiht mothers like this and they all seem to be quite anxious about making decisions, changes etc. Do you think moving out and getting some space might help? Link to comment
shes2smart Posted May 23, 2006 Share Posted May 23, 2006 Nah that ain't true. I've worked at radio stations my entire adult life. You wouldn't believe the number of people who are fortunate enough to win a nice, big prize (like a car, or week-long vacation, or large sum of money) and then complain about it. Things just are. It's up to each individual to define the good or bad in it. Link to comment
MacGyverRI Posted May 23, 2006 Share Posted May 23, 2006 You could be right, trying to be positive and having hope just always seems to lead to soul crushing disappointments for me. disappointments happen all the time to everyone. Welcome to the real world.... You can't dwell on the negative, you must think positive and learn from any mistakes that happen. You need to stop hiding and let people see you, be very visual, not invisible and women will notice you more!!! *EDIT* What is your mother like? overbearing, abusive, demeaning? Father? still together? Mother blames every guy for anything? . Link to comment
Ross_K Posted May 23, 2006 Author Share Posted May 23, 2006 Ross At least 80-99% of the people on here and a good portion of them women, have told you being positive is attractive to women. That should be crystal. I know but it's hard because of what I explained earlier, especially since I don't know if it will still definatley get me a woman. Until you become positive there is no real point in belabouring the issue of having a GF. The only way to find some positivity is to get out there and try things and fail and then succeed. I am not talking about dating I am talking about getting a job, going to school, playing sports, playing music etc etc whatever. You mentioned something about your mother that made me think she is overbearing and controlling. I have a few mates wiht mothers like this and they all seem to be quite anxious about making decisions, changes etc. Do you think moving out and getting some space might help? Maybe, I would like to move out, but I need to decide about what I'm going to do and then do it so I can get myself an okay place, I don't want to just move to some crappy flat in a bad area. Link to comment
tylercdurden2004 Posted May 23, 2006 Share Posted May 23, 2006 I know but it's hard because of what I explained earlier, especially since I don't know if it will still definatley get me a woman. Well you can never be sure or know anything if you dont.........TRY. Maybe, I would like to move out, but I need to decide about what I'm going to do and then do it so I can get myself an okay place, I don't want to just move to some crappy flat in a bad area. You need to start looking first. Maybe moving to another city. I lived in Edinburgh smack dab in teh centre by the castle and St Giles Cathedral. Place was not too bad although not the best but good part of town. RENT = 25 pounds a week. Point is there are places to be had, you need to look. Now you didnt directly answer if your mother is overbearing. Is she? Does she seem to want to control your life and decisions? Link to comment
Ross_K Posted May 23, 2006 Author Share Posted May 23, 2006 So are you originally from Scotland? How did you get to live in America,? i've always wanted to live in America. Yes, my mum is overbearing, and it's like she want's to control my life. Link to comment
AwdreeHpburn Posted May 23, 2006 Share Posted May 23, 2006 Come on over Ross. CROSS THE WATER DUDE! i've got a single sister and a couple single hottie gf's over here.... Link to comment
MacGyverRI Posted May 23, 2006 Share Posted May 23, 2006 Come on over Ross. CROSS THE WATER DUDE! i've got a single sister and a couple single hottie gf's over here.... Where is here? Are they very intelligent? I'm always looking.... Link to comment
AwdreeHpburn Posted May 23, 2006 Share Posted May 23, 2006 He's in England MacGyver. And to your 2nd question. No they're not very intelligent. But that's the beauty of them....they make me look gooooood. I'm kidding. Yes, they're very bright. Link to comment
Ross_K Posted May 23, 2006 Author Share Posted May 23, 2006 Come on over Ross. CROSS THE WATER DUDE! i've got a single sister and a couple single hottie gf's over here.... They wouldn't want me. Link to comment
renaissancewoman101 Posted May 23, 2006 Share Posted May 23, 2006 Ross K, like everybody else says, dont focus on your shortcomings because if you focus on that, you will give it off to other people and drive people away from you or turn people off. You have a lot going for you. So, focus on the positives, what you feel good about, or what people here think is good about you. Focus on those positives and forget the negatives because negative thoughts will make you undesirable to people and make people bored of you. My best friend is very negative on himself and he looks at everything as being against him. For example, if it is raining or the traffic is bad, he takes it as God being against him. He tires me out with his constant complaining and his life isnt that bad. He has a decent job, makes good money, owns a house, and has a lot of money saved up, yet if you hear him talk, you would think that he is one paycheck from the poorhouse and that nobody likes him. Ross, if you were here, I would take you out for a cup of coffee. I think you are a nice guy. Link to comment
tylercdurden2004 Posted May 23, 2006 Share Posted May 23, 2006 So are you originally from Scotland? How did you get to live in America,? i've always wanted to live in America. Yes, my mum is overbearing, and it's like she want's to control my life. Nay scottish, in blood though. And ahem, I am Canadian. Now go brush up on your geography, we are more than the big Pink spot at the top of map you know! Listen man liek I said you have some striking similarities between a a few mates that have what I would consider over bearing moms, but thats all point of views. Moms always love you and they act in what they think is in your best interest but sometimes its not what IS in your best interest. I really think you need to break away from her. I cant be more plain and blunt about it. Nothing else will change unless you do that. All the other stuff is like pulling the top off of weeds. You need to pull out the root as well. After all it is YOUR life not your mothers and you shoudl and deserve to live it how YOU see fit. Not how your mother sees fit. What she thinks about your life is totally irrelevant. And Ross if you dont learn how to fend for yourself first, what are you goign to do when she passes on? Sobering but true. Link to comment
Ross_K Posted May 23, 2006 Author Share Posted May 23, 2006 Thanks, I'd like that. But I bet if I was there you'd just suddenly find me undesirable like all women do. Maybe I don't produce pheremones or something. Link to comment
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