I don't know what to do.

[HeatherPresley68]

Last night my boyfriend reluctantly admitted to me that he has been looking at profiles of other girls on myspace. Now I'm not talking about just random girls that he may have gone to highschool with. The profiles that he looks at are of very trashy girls, the kinds that would be in pornos. The pictures are very slutty. He told me that all guys do things like this and actually got mad at me for being upset with him. He says that I always bring him down when I get depressed after he tells me things like this. We've been togeather for almost two years and I love him but this isn't the first time we've had issues like this. Hes is very sweet to me until we have confrontations. He says that I'm way too strict with him. I don't want to break up with him because I really do care for him but I cant keep feeling wrecked by him. He has no remorse for his part in our problems and he never holds himself responsible.

Its a hard situation to judge if you don't know him personally but I would really appreciate any advice. Thanks

[dopexile]

It sounds to me like you may have some personal insecurity issues. If he wants to cheat on you then he's going to do it either way, regardless if you try and control him. If you try and watch over him and control him he is more likely to cheat on you because you are putting a seed in his mind that talking to other women is a "forbidden fruit".

 

If a woman ever tried to pull this number with me I would escort her to the door no questions asked. If you have a valid reason as to why you can't trust him then that may be another issue, but at some point you're just going to have to learn to trust him and relinquish your fear. If he does cheat on you for some myspace skank then that's his loss.

[HeatherPresley68]

Cheating on me isn't the issue. I know he won't cheat on me. I don't think that he should be checking out these types of girls on myspace.

[dopexile]

Well it's not an issue then.. all men do it and it's part of culture. He's going to see a lot of women in his life whether it's on tv, at work, in public, etc. Honestly I would say he has reacted appropriately, I don't know any real man that would stand for being told what he can look at by a woman. On your end of things you need to just let it ride otherwise you will suffocate him to the point that something bad will happen. If he starts talking to the women then you need to put your foot down.

[Momene]

If he's just looking, it's quite normal and people in relationships (even good ones) can be attracted to other people. What you do need to check is that he's not chatting to them about sex and/or arranging to meet.