I Love her and Afraid She's Leaving.

[JRM]

Hi, everyone. This may end up to be a long post, but please read my story.

 

I've been with my girlfriend since October now, and things have been going pretty well, up till now. A month or two after we got together, she told me that she had talked to her old boyfriend.

 

The thing with her old boyfriend: They went out together a while before I even met her. She says the pretty much fell in love and her family was expecting her to (eventually) marry him and blah, but for one reason or another, he had to move to Honduras. This basically means they were forced to break up.

 

Back to a month or two after we got together. She said that out of nowhere, her boyfriend contacted her and told her that he still loves her. She said she feels sort of bad because she doesn't love him anymore, but it wasn't a big deal at the time.

 

Last month. Turns out he is coming back to California to visit some time near summer. At this time, I really like my girlfriend a lot, but I wouldnt say i was in love with her. She comes to me and tells me that she needs to know that I'm serious about our relationship because she is serious about it, and does not want to end up like she has in her previous relationships, hung out to dry. I tell her that while I may not be in love with her yet I am serious about the relationship and want to keep going. Some time afterwards (maybe a few weeks to a month) she tells me that she thinks she may be in love with me.

 

Yesterday: We go to a park where we spend a little timetogether, and in a quite, standstill moment, she turns to me nd tells me that Old Boyfriend decided to come back to California to go to school. After, he wants to take her back to Honduras where he and my girfriend will basically live together and eventually get married. Obviously, I'm not happy about this. When she asks what I want to do, I tell her that it's not up to me and she needs to make a decision. She told me that he asked her to marry him and that she just said "I don't know", because he doesn't know about me.

 

Now, just a few days before this, I had been thinking. I'll skip all of the intimate details and jut say that I realized I had fallen in love with her over time.

 

Anyway, the coversation carried and and I eventually relunctantly admitted that I had fallen in love her her, but I can't bother if she is just going to end up with another guy when he comes along.

 

 

There are still a few rough edges around and some details I forgot to mention, but that's the basic scheme of our situation. I already know what I want. I love her, and I want to be with her. It's way too early both in the realtionship and our lives to worry about much more than what's in the present and the near future, but I know that right now I want to be with her. The problem is that I still dont know what she wants. I dont know if she still loves me, and I don't know what she's going to do when Old Boyfriend pays his visit to our town.

 

So what I'm asking of you is your opinion on the situation.

 

I love her, and want to be with her.

 

She still apparently wants to be with me, and acts like it, but I don't know what her true intentions are.

 

She still hasn't yet told me whether she wants to be with me or him.

 

I fear she wants to stay with me to keep me from feaking out, then get back with him when he comes along. The problem with this is that I don't want to be with someone who is eventually going to leve for someone else.--I won't be with someone else's lover.

 

This pains be to think about, so please share what you think.

 

Thanks

[Süsser Tod]

Let her go?

 

This girl is putting you under WAY TOO MUCH pressure, heck, you are 16 and she is talking about marriage???

 

And she has marriage plans with the other guy??? Damn, I would feel cheated, and would have dumped her since then, but that is just me.

[JRM]

That's the thing. She doesn't have marrage plans with him, he wants them, and her family is execting her fall back in love and go off with him.

[xprincessbugx]

I think your gonna get the short end of the stick on this one honestly. I think you should cut your losses now instead of letting this go on, because if she can't even tell him no, we can't do this I'm with someone right now and it's not fair to him then obviously she's keeping one of you on the backburner just incase it doesn't work out. I'd say see ya! Figure things out with your life.