Do I Let Her Know I have Fallen in Love With Her?

[Swannee]

Here's the scoop. 4-1/2 Years ago I met a girl at work who recently broke up with her boyfriend of 7 years, she broke it off, he did not want to buy a town home with her, so I imagine he did not want to make a commitment, being that I did not want to be the rebound man, I just wanted to be her friend and get to now her better, she was filled with a lot of anger at the time. I try to replace her negative feeling about her break up with positive ones. In time 1-1/2" years we became very good friends, I liked and grew to respect her very much. On her birthday I gave here a Chocolate Turtles & a C.D. the song on the C.D. was the same as her name she liked it very much and my gifts were appreciated. 2 weeks later I was layed off because off lake of work. She hugged me goodby I called her twice. The last conversation I felt she wanted to get off the phone, so I took that that she was not interested in me so I chalked it all up as a learning exsperience. I never thought I would see her again or was hoping she would miss me enough to call me. She never called. About 2-1/2 years later I was out of work and needed a job so I reapplied and was taken back with the company (family Business), I did not think I would have a problem working with her, I kind a recented the fact that I felt I was rejected. Now she has a new boyfriend that moved in with her who is also out of work. We recently have gone out to lunch together twice, we have the best deep conversation about life, family. I can not stop thinking of her, I think of her day and night, I love her. She is 30 years old, I am 38 years old. She has told her boyfriend that I am her only buddy at work. She has told her boyfriend that she feels bad that she is leaving me behind when she went on vacation. The other day she was telling me about a dramadic expercience she had growing up with her parents, I supported her in telling her that what they did to her was wrong, they use to beat her and say she was bad, and would send her away to be with her grand parents every summer because she was bad, she burst out crying, I wanted to comfort her and hug her, I froze, I was afraid she might even cry harder if I tryed, she said she felt bad for crying in front of me and was embarressed, I told her she was great, I think she wanted to her that and liked it but said nothing. I later dropped her a note in which I wrote that she should not feel bad that she cryed in front of me that it was a natural way for her to express her emotions and feelings with me and that it makes me feels special, I aplogized for not giving her a hug, but that I held back, but that I wanted to, I asked her to give me a big smile, so that I would know she feeling better. she did smile. I went on vacation 1 week before she did, and missed her dearly, I made her a wooden spoon carved by my own hands that I want to give her she likes pasta and I figured that she would think of me when she used it. I have told her in the past that I like her, I have never told her I love her, how does a man tell a girl he works with that he loves her, when she is living with a other man. We are both looking for new jobs, we hate our jobs. so I wanted to tell her once one of us leaves. Should I tell her I love her, I have never held her in my arms or kissed her yet I love her. Your advise is greatly appreciated. Please help.

[electric_blue_lightening]

hiya! u didnt say ur name, but that dusnt really matter, in Louise, u can call me lou, I think yo uare in quite a hard situation, at the age of 16 i had several times when i fancied someone cand was dying to tell them but i had other things to wury about like the lkad aveing a bf, or them beinga very close friend, i didnt wana loosed the friendship, and sometimes i held bck my feelings form the world because i was afraid of loosing that person completely, and i wud rather have them as a gud mate and not be able to tell them how i feel then to risk loosing them as a friend after i told them my feelings.

 

I cant really compare my experience to that of yours, as i am much younger, but i still hope i help....... you sound like u have an infactuation, i had one, and people of all ages have them al lthe time! its not just something you have as a teenager like sum ppl think, maybe you should tyr and physically show/hint about ur feelingsd for her? and see what her reaction is? she maybe could just be looking for a friend at the moment, someone to look aftre her, is this man she lives with very close to her? i mean are the ymarried? cuz if they are you should be careful what you say cuz u wudntlike to stuir truble, also, when you both (if you both) leave your jobs, does this mean you will see less of eachother? if so you might like to tell her sooner how you feel otherwise yu will never know

 

From a girls point of view, even tho i am young i still think like a girl, its a nice feeling to know that someone admires you, i wouldnt stress that you love her yet, just let her know you have some srtonger feelings for her than u 1st thought?

 

i hope these suggestions have helped you, if u need to talk im here .........