Im confused to whethere this girl likes me or not ??

[Jonboy582]

Okay well here is the story

 

There is this girl I really like and I am not sure if she likes me or if things that have happened between us were just a run of co-incidences.

 

We have ended up "sleeping" together (meaning sleep sleep) and kissed.

 

The first time we "slept" together was in a tent with 3 other peole, but we shared a sleeping bag, and were in each others arms all night and very close. But I dont know if thats just because she was trying to keep me warm as I was very cold.

 

Anouther night we ended up kissing alot at a party, but we were both very drunk so that could just be because she was very drunk why we ended up kissing. Although 4 hours later after we sobered up alot, we did kiss again.

 

Later that same night we went back to her place + one other girl which I had the pleasure of sharing a bed with both of them hehe And again that night we ended up in the same position as when camping but also holding hands. But yet again is this her just being comfy in bed and drunk, or could these be signs she likes me.

 

Any advice would be much appritiated, because if it is likely she likes me I would want to maybe ask her out sooner than later before the situation changes.

 

Jon

[kellbell]

All I know, if I shared a sleeping bag with a guy and held hands and kissed...I am definitely interested! I would never share a sleeping bag with a guy whom I had no interest at all. LOL Bust a move mate, ask her out on a proper date. Good luck and let me know how everything turns out.

[Gauchori]

well... if she didn't kiss any other guy as much as it seems she kissed u than.... yeah man- She's interested.

 

Also.. that sleeping bag shering and the fact that you're not a weirdo who traid to take advantage of her, also shows good things about you.

 

I'm not a big fan of asking a girl out, but that is a huge thing for girls as they feel more scure of having you when you two are.. commited...

 

Anyways just try not to stutter or sweat so much when you ask her out, try to have good breath, (which i guess you have since all the kissing and the sleeping bag shering) just lean back on your chair if you are sitting, be comfortable, calm and cool and look at her in the eyes.

 

Good luck

-A friend

[Goodfun88]

Ask her out already! She's probably been waiting forever for you to make a move. Ask her out before you lose your chance! Good luck!

[AwdreeHpburn]

yeh - like Goodfun said!!

 

Dude, if I were you, I'd act quickly on this one because if I were HER, I wouldn't wait around forever!!

[PocoDiablo]

Oh yeah, if you DON'T ask her out she is going to think you don't like her.

 

Heck, I wrote a whole article about it here:

 

link removed

 

It's a must read in this case. Go check it out.

[Jonboy582]

Poco Diablo I read that before and was good (VERY LONG). And thanks everyone, well im going to a gig tonight and apparently she is there so I will ask her then

 

1 Small problem though, she lives like 25 miles away, I can drive, but I ordered a brand new car and they make them to order. As somone placed an order of 500 cars it pushed the date of mine back a couple of months. SO I dont get it until May 8th. This means I have to use parents car, and that inturn entails sharing it and as I used it alot lately I have not got much ground to stand on to get the use of it. And there in lies my prediciment TRANSPORT

 

And I think I will have afew drinks before I ask her aswell lol.

 

Thans everyone Jon

 

(oh and by the way poco there is a typing error under what indicates you been friendzoned you typed Yuo not You hehe

[Jonboy582]

well... if she didn't kiss any other guy as much as it seems she kissed u than.... yeah man- She's interested.

Only me, and oh and this one girl lol who we shared the bed with. That was something to do with other girl wanting to get taste out of her mouth after kissing some bloke

[PocoDiablo]

Poco Diablo I read that before and was good (VERY LONG). And thanks everyone, well im going to a gig tonight and apparently she is there so I will ask her then

Sounds like a smart move.

 

1 Small problem though, she lives like 25 miles away, I can drive, but I ordered a brand new car and they make them to order. As somone placed an order of 500 cars it pushed the date of mine back a couple of months. SO I dont get it until May 8th. This means I have to use parents car, and that inturn entails sharing it and as I used it alot lately I have not got much ground to stand on to get the use of it. And there in lies my prediciment TRANSPORT.

It's only a problem if you make it a problem. In fact, it's probably less of a problem then you think. It just means you have to make plans for days and times you know you will have the car. No big deal, really.

 

Just be sure it's really clean inside!

 

And I think I will have afew drinks before I ask her aswell lol.

I would recommend ONLY one or two at the *most* because too much alcohol will make you look like (1) you don't have self control and (2) you're a drunk. Trust me, just a few so you can be relaxed and smooth. You need to be able to think. Even I have a hard time being social when I am drunk, and I practically do this for a living!

 

Thans everyone Jon

 

(oh and by the way poco there is a typing error under what indicates you been friendzoned you typed Yuo not You hehe)

Me? Make a misteak? Nevar!

[Jonboy582]

Ok then I will have a couple of pints first which will work out nicely as she is coming to gig like an hour after it starts. Lets just hope I dont chicken out.

 

I don't want to get drunk seeming as I have drunk every night since 4 days aggo and last night the liver started hurting so I stopped after two cans.

 

The thing is if I can get the car at all now, becuase I have used about £40 of fuel in the last week alone on my excersions Butif she says yes im sure I can make arrangements.

 

finally I think the great and almighty PocoDiablo did make a tiny typo hehe.

[Jonboy582]

Well here is an update on the situation the outcome was the same just didn't happen in the way I would have liked.

 

We both went to the gig and had a good time, but I did not get any time alone with her all night as basically everyone there was her mate and they all wanted to talk to her. And the one time I tried asking her I was literally shouting it at her in her ear from 2 inches away but could not hear a the music was so loud. So that did not work either.

 

So basically I had to wait until after the gig and text her on the way home, which I did not want to do (asking her out by text). But still I explained this in the text and she said yes of course she would love to. Now im left with a problem I never thought of what to do and when. So anybody got any ideas of what I can do?

 

(and I know PocoDiablo it says go get a coffee or something like that and know exactely what and when you want to do something, but this slightly different as its not as though I have not been out with her before, but all these times it was with other people, so I do know her. But I could always do that, I just dont want to bore her hehe and im doing a round trip of like 40 odd miles so I want to do something worth while)

 

Jon

[PocoDiablo]

Meh, I'm a psychologist, not a writer!

 

Go get her. You'll regret more not trying than if you do. Every guy who I have talked to afterwards has said "I feel so much better now, it was a lot easier than I imagined."

 

Just don't think about it. Do it.

[PocoDiablo]

Somehow I missed this post, shall I reply now?

 

Well here is an update on the situation the outcome was the same just didn't happen in the way I would have liked.

 

We both went to the gig and had a good time, but I did not get any time alone with her all night as basically everyone there was her mate and they all wanted to talk to her.

This is why coffee dates are better. No distractions, no entertainment value. If she likes you she's going to go to coffee with you. If she doesn't, a concert is free and she can flirt with other guys ... oops.

 

And the one time I tried asking her I was literally shouting it at her in her ear from 2 inches away but could not hear a the music was so loud. So that did not work either.

Again, this is why that was a bad idea for a date. I think I mentioned that in my article... right?

 

So basically I had to wait until after the gig and text her on the way home, which I did not want to do (asking her out by text). But still I explained this in the text and she said yes of course she would love to. Now im left with a problem I never thought of what to do and when. So anybody got any ideas of what I can do?

Did I mention coffee date?

 

(and I know PocoDiablo it says go get a coffee or something like that and know exactely what and when you want to do something, but this slightly different as its not as though I have not been out with her before, but all these times it was with other people, so I do know her. But I could always do that, I just dont want to bore her hehe and im doing a round trip of like 40 odd miles so I want to do something worth while)

Oh, I *did* mention a coffee date! Yeah, a coffee date. Think about this a second. You said "I want to do something worth while. What, spending time with you ISN'T worth while? Are you saying you're such a bad person that she won't spend time with you if you don't take her some place fancy? So everytime you want to go out with her you're going to have to take her some place expensive? Is that what you want? I would put MONEY on the fact that she wants to get to KNOW you. Over coffee. Or a picnic with PB&J sandwhiches and water and chips.

 

You need to re-read my articles...

 

For a first date, it's important to remember that you are NOT trying to entertain her by taking her to a fancy place or the latest opera, NOT trying to show off your financial flexibility by purchasing her time (with dinner, movies, or gifts), and you are NOT going to over-step your boundries and do something that would make her feel like a * * * * or like you are going to take advantage of her on the first date (read: you're not going to just * * * * her.)

 

The ideal first date is simple - literally! You should offer to take her to a Starbucks or a upscale local bar that is reasonably quiet and clean. A gentleman always pays for his date, and since you don't even know this woman in a romantic sense, you will want to understand that buying every woman a $20 dinner, $9 movie ticket, and $10 in alcohol can be a very expensive proposition. In addition, it deflects from her getting to know you. Taking her to a movie prevents her from talking to you, and from you getting to know her. Inviting her to a movie at your place just screams "I want to * * * * you!" which is a bad move for any long term relationship just starting out.

 

So this is why a nice quiet place is ideal. You want a place where she and you can just talk. You want to invite her so she knows that she is there to be with YOU, and YOU alone. A woman could have an out of town boyfriend, and if you offer dinner and dancing, she's going to know full well that (1) you're an idiot buying her time and (2) you're a sucker who she can take advantage of and then blow off at the end of the night. Don't be the sucker!

 

1. The date. Do something that has low cost and low entertainment value. For example, meeting at a Starbucks for a coffee or an upscale and quiet bar for a drink is a great idea because it allows the two of you to sit and talk to each other. In addition, it should not cost you a lot. If you were to date ten women and took each one for a drink, that would potentially cost you $10 a date. However, if you took those ten dates to dinner and a movie, at a cost of $50 each, that's a lot more. From the perspective of cost, the whole point is not to buy random women meals but to get to know her. So money should not be a factor in first dates. In addition, if you avoid venues like movies and concerts, etc., you can be assured that you have not met a woman who is just going out with you because her other boyfriend (who she "forgot" to mention) is out of town and she is bored. Finally, if you do go someplace with low entertainment value (i.e., not a sports bar with 42 TV's) she and you will not be distracted. Instead, you can sit and talk to each other and get to know who likes what, etc.

 

Now if the date goes bad, you are also not locked into a big meal and have not wasted $22 on two movie tickets. Or whatever those ridiculous costs are at the movie theater!!! You're really only out the $5 for her drink, as you consumed yours.

 

If you do go to a bar, be SURE not to (1) get drunk (2) order shots.

I love quoting myself. Ha ha.

 

Anyway, what more do you need to know? You apparently DIDN'T learn your lesson at the concert. Are you going to do it twice in a row? Why would you take her ANYwhere that other men might hit on her? That's craaaaazy! Take her some place where you and she can talk ... alone. If she's into you, and she knows it's a date, it's a logical next move so she can get to know you and vice versa. Go read my articles...

 

link removed

 

Among others: link removed

 

Then come back and tell me you invited her to a coffee date. Besides, if you are driving that far, you're already going WAY out of your way to be with her (probably too much so, but I won't bother you with the details of that now.)

 

So ... update us when you are done, okay?

[Jonboy582]

I have read the whole article I just meant something worth while, as traveling that far just for coffee then going home could be abit of a waste of time. I mean spend more time doing something. And were you serious bout the picnic (different menu though) as that seems pretty nice except its cold.

 

I did not take her to the gig she was already going and so was I and thats when I wanted to ask her out. And yes she said she would go on a date with me I just need to set a date, and think of something to do. And I know she likes me already now which is good. And I know her nowso thats why I thought could do something other than coffee.

 

But thanks for your long and detailed and thourough answer

[CamGuy]

Wow, some guys are clueless.

[PocoDiablo]

Wow, some guys are clueless.

And everone appreciates being clued in, so feel free to enlighten anyone who is out in the dark. We could all use another opinion because we all make mistakes and overlook things that are completely obvious to others.

 

Really.

[CamGuy]

And everone appreciates being clued in, so feel free to enlighten anyone who is out in the dark. We could all use another opinion because we all make mistakes and overlook things that are completely obvious to others.

 

Really.

 

No Problem, I love cluing people in. lol. I love brutal honesty. Beats being PC.

[Jonboy582]

You going to comment or not then?