Instant Messanging fears?

[Prufrock06]

Hey everyone,

 

Does anyone else have this paranoid concern about Instant Messanging other people? As in, you want so bad to send them an IM just to say hi or start a conversation but you always feel like you would be bothering them so you end up not IMing them at all? I know this is me, sometimes, haha.

 

For instance, I met someone off a dating site and we exchanged AIM names. We talked briefly once -- he was online this evening and I wanted to talk with him, but again was worried about bothering him by dropping an IM. I guess I was waiting for him to IM me, but maybe he could have been thinking the exact same thing on his end? Anyway, he then signed off and I'm wondering if I should have just put my foot down and IMed him with a witty remark or a hello....I notice though, this can also be an issue with friends on my list who I haven't spoken to in a while, or new friends I've made -- I always hesitate to IM them and manage to talk myself out of it by saying "they're busy", "they are just going to say hi and come up with a reason for leaving" etc. Pretty insecure of me, huh? So I don't think it's just the fact that I like this guy that makes me feel this way, but a general AIM issue overall.

 

So now I'm trying to seek out any advice from people who either have this problem or who think I'm being silly in being so concerned about the social politics of Instant Messenger (I think I fall into this latter camp, haha). Am I being unreasonable in thinking this way? Or maybe I'm being rational?

 

Thanks in advance!

[Tigris]

I think you should just IM them Prufrock and enjoy the time you spend with each friend no matter how long it is.

 

Remember, it's good to keep in touch.

[renaissancewoman101]

I used to be paranoid about IMing people esp if they would not answer right away. But I have gotten used to IMing with people and a lot of people that IM with, also multitask so they are usually IMing other people or doing other things that might make them not IM back right away.

 

My ex and I used to IM each other all the time because it was a lot cheaper than talking on the phone. We only stopped IMing when I got him a cell phone. IMing is fun because we can type and change things before pressing the "send" button.

[tmp0620]

I'm not like that with most people, but with this one girl I always want to talk to her when I see her online but I'm scared to death I'd be annoying her and that she'd just talk to me to be nice. So you're not alone.

[iceberg21]

You miss 100% of the shots you never take. -Wayne Gretzky

[MewSkitty]

I'm never shy when it comes to IMing people....IMs are my life. If it wasn't for AIM I never would have met Jesse, but that's another story....just to say this, but I can't have a relationship with someone unless they have AIM or MSN...I hate talking on the phone.....I'm rambling on again aren't I? Well this is my first time being on a nonPokemon site....and a relationship site....I'm a little nervouse about posting anywhere on this place....I think I'll shut up now....

[NewPhillyGuy]

Try not to worry so much, man. Listen - if the person is that busy why is he/she on IM in the first place? They are on there to talk of course. This is what away msgs, idle is for. Some people will sit there behind an away msg just waiting for ppl to IM!

 

If you do IM someone who is active and the person says they are busy, then whatever just be like hit me up sometime later.

 

Try not to think about it so hard. Just think - if someone doesn't want to talk to you, that's their loss.

[SilverManic]

Many of my convos on msn start hi... blah how are you.. uhuh, what you up to? meaning if they are busy they are gonna tell me. Or sometimes they take a while to reply (5 mins) after 5 I userally get board.

 

'Yeah I'm gonna go watch a movie' But that only really happens with my best friend irl. She just moved over to the states and is dancing round her bf I wouldn't worry. Just IM the person if they don't like you for you they arn't worth your time.

[Pioneer_UK]

my first online relationship, i can give some strange things here.. i actually got talking to this girl for a joke, i sent her a picture and it was actually a trojan.(in my teens lmao) anyway long time ago,, which resulted in a marrage so its cool

 

anyway i gave her a keylogger, and this was before ur laws!

and i monitored her actions, i saw her typing something like

 

HI

which kinda gave me the upper hand somehow.. but i guess its creepy?

thinking back..

 

a few years on and no torjan... now i have met a girl online, and i find myself thinking should i pm her right now or pretend i didnt notice if i saw her come online.., will she think im crazy? LOL! should i pretend im busy and see if shes really intrested in talking to me... revenge hey!

 

but i think the best thing to do is... HI! good to see you! just be urself

and do what your heart tells you!