i woke up it's a new day, i still feel awfull

[b8s]

i dont know what to say, writing here is stoping me from texting him right now.

 

i just feel horrible. i am a great looking nice caring person who only wants the best for the people i care about. right now i just feel useless and alone and why can't i do anything right?my ex was no where near as good looking as me and he wasnt entirely sure what he wanted from life he is 26 im 30 i allways told myself i would never date someone yonger because he wouldn't be in the same place as me.. broke my own first rule because he was nice and i liked him. look where it got me. not thinking highly of myself crying non stop hating life and becoming a weak begging person, all the things i never was.

 

i know everyone tells me he is not worth it i can do so much better even he is telling me that. but why cant i decide what i want and what i think is good for me..

 

his gut told him he wasnt right for me and it wasnt going to work out. my gut tells me he is perfect for me and we will have a long happy future.

why is his gut right and mine doesnt count?

he hates confrontation thats a crock life is confrontation!!

 

terrible upset and didnt want to phone him again so thanks for listening.

[Omni-I]

errr...maybe you want something that you can't have? Alot if not all people are like that. Go figure, I like the easy way out. How about i make you forget him and making you feel like a woman again? LOL Plus I am even younger than your ex hehe, though just by a year.

[b8s]

you think??? i want something i can't have, go figure i thought me at home ALONE and upset was telling me i could have it!!!!

[Sad_now]

Each day will get better. If his heart wasn't in it, his gut told him it was wrong, yuo can do nothing, except try to heal. If he wants you back, he will have to realise that himself. Im afraid there is nothing you can say to change his mind. Focus on yourself and try to heal. XX

[Beyondthesea]

It will be better in time, you'll see.

 

Right now it is very hard because there's been a sense of finality in the relationship and it is a shock really. You will be ok.

 

Give yourself a break and realize you will feel rough for the next while. You will be alright though, and we're all here to listen.

[sbrew21]

I know how you are feeling. I just got out of a relationship and the guy was much younger than me too. We know we are too good for them yet something keeps us hooked on them.

 

Move on....ha ha, yea right if it was that easy none of us would be on here. I know more than anything you want him back in your life because I am the same way. I gave myself 5 weeks of no contact before I casually called him to see if he wanted to meet up and surprisingly he went out with me. Of course now I am more confused than I was before. Anyway, make goals for yourself even if they are really small ones. It helps a little bit.

 

Cross off days you don't talk to him. Try to give yourself at least 30 days. Work out everyday, even though you are exhausted. Just try and find distractions for yourself. Try to go on a date, even if you don't like him....its a distraction. Surround yourself with poeple all the time.

 

I have a theory guys always come back....they just get freaked out and when you really just don't care anymore they come knocking on your door. Not to give you any false hope.

 

You are going to have really great days, and not so great days. It sucks but you are surviving without them in your life. Too bad us girls are emotional basketcases. We have to try and grow some backbones.

[Scout]

Be careful b8s...when one is feeling this anger and sadness, they tend to do things they regret: as in contacting the ex.

 

Be strong! You don't want to act on your emotions right now, it will just make things worse. Hang in there, girl. It's going to pass.

[indespair]

Sorry to hear you're having another bad day b8s...I wish I could tell you that it gets easier. It doesn't really get easier, but it does get workable. I agree with the statement that guys sometimes just get freaked out with the thought that you love them SO much, they leave, only to come back later, with some kind of realization. The hard part about that is that you've usually already moved on and don't want him back. Could be they might be commitment phobic, or just have never experienced what total love feels like. Either way, they ARE thinking about you during this time. The guy I was dating is much younger than me, BTW. He's 23, and when I met him he had been living with a 40 year old woman. He says now that he doesn't know who he is...feels like he doesn't know anything...wants to assert his independence,...pave his own way...etc. These were all reasons for breaking up with me. I can understand his wanting to be a "man" but we had a VERY close intense relationship, very emotionally committed to each other, and his breaking up with me came completely out of the blue. It really seems like he freaked out too...I know one size doesn't fit all, but I'd love to peek inside a man's mind to try and figure out why they do stuff like this!!! When they KNOW that what they are doing hurts so much!

[shamus]

Ladies,

 

the same thing happens to us guys. It's weird, if we're too nice, they dont want us. it's tough.

my ex and i agreed to meet for coffee monday. at the end, we said couples counseling should be an answer. later that night she says she doesnt want to do it, because i said let's keep things between us quiet, not have friends family know of our drama and dirty laundry until we can work things out. she said it hurt her feelings, yet kept it bottled up.

tuesday, i was done with work early. she called and texted a few times early afternoon...i was sleeping(up very late the night before), didnt know she was calling. she shows up at my place at 3:30pm, i'm in my boxers. told her hold on. i step outside. she says why dont you let me in? i told her because my dog is going nuts and we can talk better out here.

well, we went inside, she immediately went into my room, checked my closet to see if i had a girl hidden there. ISSUES!

i asked her what she was doing here-she says to see how I'm doing. yeah right.

we talk some more, she says she doesnt want to work things out, so i said well then leave me alone. I'm not here for your convience. she says fine, no calls, no texts. of course that night she sent me 20 texts and called 40 times(my cell had listed 37 missed calls)-again i was sleeping as i was completely exhausted, physically and emotionally.

wednesday more texts, but more bs. she says she loves me...blah blah blah...only wants happiness for me. again i told her leave me alone I'm not her security blanket.

i stood up for myself. tired of the bs

yes i miss her, think of her. but i'm happy to move on now.

 

b8s, brew, others...one day at a time. realize what you had to offer and that it is thier loss.

we all hurt.

take charge of yourself. i've been spending so much time with my dog...at least i know he truly loves me and will be loyal. remember you deserve the best, not someone who cant make up their mind or plays games.