Messy or clean??

[Big Jim]

Just for curiousoity sake, was your guys break up clean and civil, or was it dramatic and fighting. Mine personnaly has progressed from a civil one, to a soap opera style brawl. And was there any contact down the road??

 

No im not hoping for contact, i could have it if i want, see her all the time, just curious if after such brutal fights and such people let it go and talk.

[Big Jim]

Also i almost find the drama brawl way better in a sick way. When it was civil, i was like * * * * look what im losing, this beautiful, kind, caring girl. Now i think, whoa didnt see that side of you, and surprisingly dont miss her the same way. Im sure this is short term, since the good will be remembered in the long run, but it works right now. Hard to miss someone who was so uncompromising

[passions1]

It was messy initially, b/c my ex (from long distant relationship) had broken up with me via email letter & that he could not be contacted b/c he left his cell phone behind when he moved to another place. It was harsh b/c I had felt like an unwanted abandonned person.

 

However, from that type of breakup it made me realize that sometimes in life people will not give you closure & you just have to live with that & move on. Now I realize from having gained more dating experience & being with my current bf over a year what type of guy I'm more compatible with & not being afraid to be alone.

[majord23]

My current break-up is by far the most civil. I have underlying feelings of animosity associated with breaking-up, and I'm sure she has some associated with me employing NC...but we haven't had a harsh word to say to each other.

I didn'ty get angry in her presense, and she didn't get angry in mine. It's nice, but weird.

 

This is the first significant heart-break that I have gone through where this has been the case. Usually i would push and push until we had a massive fight...I would reach rock bottom...and then start healing.

 

This time however, I really am in unfamiliar territory....where my actions have in no way harmed the chances of reconcilation. It's comforting to know there is a chance....but I'm not completely sure that I'm necessarily in a better place because of it.

[CarnelianButterfly]

Never dated, so I've never had the chance to have a break up, but I lean towards the scorched earth side. I think I'd like the finallity of an atomic bomb end all fight. Why, because then I know I won't think "does he still love me?" I'm weird, but I like things to end cut and dry no dangling bits.

[renaissancewoman101]

My ex's breakup with me started off cleanly where he told me that he didnt see us going anywhere and that he lost his feelings for me. I took it ok at first and was hoping that he would see the error of his ways. Gave him two weeks of space and then met up with him again. Got drunk and got into the worst argument/fight that I had ever gotten into with him. After that, he decided not to ever get back together with me again and started to say nasty things about our breakup to people who knew the both of us. I ended up enlisting a mutual friend on my side, caused her son to stop being friends with my ex, and it turned into a nice nasty situation that I have posted amount numerous times on here.

 

As of now, I dont think we could ever be friends again. I talked to someone recently who knows the ex and he is still saying nasty things about me. He still owes me money and now won't pay me back. And I have the added weirdness of his mother every so often calling me to tell me to have hope and shape up my life if I want to have ex back.

[Dako]

I'm having a civil split from my wife. She's a sweetheart and we're doing okay so far. Neither of us needs drama and we still care about each other.

Neither of us wants to get back together.