On a break

[skyman1000]

Hi,

 

Ive been with my g/f for over 4 years, she is learning to become a teacher and at the moment is on her teaching practice. Its a hard time as she is so busy, we dont get to see each other when usually we are always together. Things have also been going through abit of a patch, no arguments as such, we just see to have become complaicent with each other. On Friday night she told me she thought we needed a break. I was drunk and have recently had some bad news about the death of a good friend, so broke down, yet she seemed fine about it. This made me feel as tho although she has only suggested a break it mite be the start of the end. We saw each other last nite to talk, and after gettin rid of my hangover and thinkin about it, i also thought it may b a good idea. last nite was her turn to get upset. We ended up having sex and seemed relly close to each other again. She told me she loved me and still sees us being together in the future. This sort of reassured me that we would be ok, but i'm just feeling abit of an emotional wreck at the moment an im still pretty worried. Do you think we will be ok?

[DN]

No I don't. Not unless you both make an effort to fix whatever is going wrong with the relationship. Most often, a break is going to be a break-up and it means that someone is not happy. The reasons for that unhappiness need to be fixed.

[miticalzz]

I also agree with DN, a break usually means a breakup. It sounds like you and your gf have some issues that need resolving.

[skyman1000]

So do i just give her the space she needs at the moment?

[miticalzz]

it sounds like you are going thru some emotional times and she is focusing on her career and her future. going to school is hard work and it requires little distractions. If you continue to see her I would make your visits pleasent. Try not to overwhelm her with your problems. Goodluck!

[DN]

So do i just give her the space she needs at the moment?

 

I think the excuse of "needing space' is a crock. If I were you I would tell her that either she's in the relationship or she's not. If she's not then I would go no contact, get over her as soon as you can, and move on. If she wants to stay in the relationship then you can both negotiate what you need to make it work.