Lost Interest or Depression?

[marigot]

I"ve been with my bf about six months. Unfortunately, our relationship started off with bad luck so it's been a bit trying. The first month was great. But then random external circumstances began occurring...

 

ie: my boyfriend is going through great financial difficulty. He's always broke. Can barely pay bills. We are unable to do things. He's been working on getting back on his feet but things keep happening...

 

Anyway, I guess my question is...how do you know if your boyfriend is suffering from depression or just losing interest? He seems withdrawn, he's monotone, doesn't seem excited to see me, seems to prefer to be alone, irritable...

 

I have asked him but he claims that "I'm just going through a lot of stuff".

[MaxPayne19]

I really don't think that it anything you've done. He's just going through hard times right now facing debt and and trying to set things straight. Im sure he will come around and things will get better soon. Just make sure your their for him to be supportive and encourage him to meet his goals.

[marigot]

I find it hard not to take it personal because our so-called honeymoon period was cut so short. And it went straight to hard times and such stress.

 

It also is hard not to be a bit resentful cause I end up paying for a lot of stuff. It's a very strange situation.

 

He will go from talking what type of engagement ring I would like one minute to avoiding me the next and not being remotely affectionate. How can you talk about the furture but act like you have no interest in the person? Talk about mixed signals.

[MeHim]

Been there, it turned out "my bf at the time" had no interest in trying.. and that was his problem, it took me to break it off and another more recent girlfriend of his to tell him he's worthless, he doesnt want to try.. to ahve him try.

 

He's doing well now, he needed the wake up call

[marigot]

he doesn't want to try what?

[MeHim]

he doesn't want to try what?

 

 

 

and He doesn't want to try to get himself out of his debt/hole

[valenski]

Sometimes, when trouble comes a partner in a relationship might feel undeserving of their mate, a man may tend to internalise their probblems rather than breden his partner, more than anything else he needs support, if you show you believe in him, that might boost his selfesteem and make him start believing in himself.

 

I hope you both pull through.

[princessdi75]

My boyfriend used to waste his money on me all the time. Then, like your bf, he was broke due to bad circumstances. Now he is mopey and depressed a lot of the time, and he refuses to let me pay for stuff we do. I would say your bf, is just in a rut and things will get better. There's tons of things you guys can do without money...just remind him of that and that you want to see him.