Can anyone help???

[mavrick]

Hey all,

I am looking for someone who can help and give some advice on my situation..

It would really be nice if you could drop me a line about this..pls.

I really dont want to bore you with my history but pls bear... pls.

 

1) I had this long distance relation ship with a girl for 2 yrs..lets say sam.

 

2) Many times we had a fight related to trust etc stuff due to a person (lets say mike) who is her friend.

 

3) She then told me that she doesnt look at me as she did -- 'like a lover'...and all she wants is to be just friends. She told me this when i had came to her city --- this was when she was just about to leave my place.. and somehow she read my face about how bad i was feeling even though i agreed to it. The next day she called and said that everything is alright and she loves me.

 

She had called me for consecutive days whenever she got an opportunity. But after 10 days she didnt.. and then she didnt call for a month (during this period I used to call her).

 

5) Then one day she called and said that she doesnt want to be in a relationship -- she wants her future to be uncertain. I said but that day you did told me that u loved me -- she said ya i had changed and i changed back.. but now i have changed again.

 

6) Ok... fine again -- i posted her a letter in which i had written about how much i missed her everyday -- from the moment i had came to this city.. i wrote about how i still cherish her childhood photo she had given me.

I wrote that i didnt want to be a jerk due to the reason that i still love her.. and didnt want to destroy this fdship and any relationship we shared due to this.

3 days later i talk -- and she's fine.. i mean she said that she was going to call me. And she said - that dont worry etc (in the way we used to talk-softly).

 

7) After about 20 days i had called her -- she had a party that day. I talked to her for 20 mins and she told me about how the party went fine and how she had enjoyed. She told me about every boy she had danced with etc.. later that day i came to know from my friend that she was with the mike all day (the one bcoz of whom we used to fight due to mistrust and things i knew about that guy). I called her again and said that she can tell me anything she wanted and she could have told me about that boy -- on this she snapped (might be obvious) and said that i am nobody to tell her what she should tell and what she should do.... that its not necessary and possible to tell each and everything that happened.. and said that she told me all what had come accross her mind. My intention in calling was to let her know that she could tell me everything cuz already our fdship was in so much trouble ... i tell you she was really angry and said that it is me who is disturbing and destroying our fdship.

 

I called her sister and told her what had happened (cuz she is my fd too -- she is 4 yrs elder to her -- but doesnt know about my history with her).. she said to relax and take things easy and this sort of a thing happens in fdship.

Yesterday me and my fd were checking emails and he got one from sam -- about fdship etc.. i saw the address bar to know to whom she had sent this -- everybody was there in her contact list except me.

I called her sister (random) and told me that sam was really pissed off at me..

i dont know what to do now -- as i really care for that girl... i really want her back... i really care for her.... i am too depressed with all this stuff. i dont enjoy doing anything now -- i cant talk to her -- cuz her sister warned that this might not be the best thing to do ... and i cant do anything.

 

Pls tell me anything-- i would do anything to get her back -- i am 400 miles away from her -- have only seen her 2 times for the last 1 yr and i miss her. I have cut both my hands and palm with blades and i am so sick.. sick of everything -- all i do now is think -- only think -- i go to bed and only think about what should i do.. i lay there for hours and then its morning -- i am not taking proper food.. proper sleep... nothing is good...

 

I have lost my respect and everything in front of her. Pls dont tell me that this is girl isnt worth ur time.. tell me anything but not this... or if not any help on the 'getting back' situation pls give me some advice to bear pain and still not be a jerk in her eyes.

[ElektraHere]

Hello,

 

Unfortunately you probably will not hear what you want on this website. You can't make someone want to be with you. I know this for a fact since I just have been dealing with this issue. I too have been in the depths of sadness over it. I am just coming around thinking that I need to focus on me and quit letting life pass me by. You have have actually inflicted injury to yourself because of her. This is not something a person should do to themselves. Perhaps talking with someone you trust about how your feeling? You miss her now but if you start living your life for you it does start to get better.

So the thing you don't want to hear is coming up......I would say you should let this relationship go and move on. Get yourself together and rebuild yourself again.

Good Luck,

[Blue In Texas]

Mavrick. If you are cutting yourself, you need to get some help asap! Please call a therapist or health care professional. Seriously, man. This is something that needs dealing with right away.

[Big Jim]

draw the line. If someone is making you hurt yourself, it is not worth it. Talk to someone, ideally a professional