teacup Posted February 10, 2006 Share Posted February 10, 2006 yes....how do i let a guy chase me? and also....how do i make him want to chase me? and what does it mean to give a guy his space? Link to comment
HaloDestroyer Posted February 10, 2006 Share Posted February 10, 2006 He'll only chase you if he likes you... You can't 'get' him to do anything. However, if you show some bold signs of interests, he might wish to... push his luck... a little further. To give a guy space is exactly the same as giving a girl space. Hope this helps Link to comment
DN Posted February 10, 2006 Share Posted February 10, 2006 Trying to get a guy to chase you implies playing games. Not a good idea. Making yourself look happy and confident without being arrogant, and being approachable is a prime way of attracting people which is an entirely different concept. Treating a guy as an equal and expecting to be treated as an equal also helps and trying to be chased is not part of that concept. Link to comment
teacup Posted February 10, 2006 Author Share Posted February 10, 2006 sigh.......i am SO confused by this guy. i am 26. he is 37. we saw each other for about 5-6 dates back in november. i thought things were going well, though he seemed like he was getting a bit bored. then, he found out i went out with his friend for 2 dates at the same time (i made out with his friend too).....it was drama! he pushed me away and i went on vacation for a month and didnt see him. i called him when i got back and he suggested going to coffee sometime. i said, how about a movie and he said okay. and later on i called him and we went to the movies. he was all over me though i dont think he just wants sex. i wasnt in the mood so i pushed him away. i am affectionate but he wasn't that responsive. but at the end of the night.....we gave a hug and kiss and he said talk to you soon. but we didn't speak until i called him a week later.....and he said mabe we can see each other later on this week......and i said, oh i was thinking of waiting a little longer (because i am busy). i feel like i am always chasing him and he doesnt chase me. but at least he always suggests doing something first when i call. (though why does he never state a specific date and time?) i kind of feel like we have an agreement that we're seeing each other. i asked him before vacation that if he didnt want to see me anymore, he would tell me straight out right? and he said yes. i cannot read him at all. i cant tell if he likes me at all. i just think he must be so laidback and such a cool customer. either that or he has so much experience with women.......in his words, he "goes with the flow". i told him that i might like him and that i was scared and he said "don't be." well, geez, i am confused. Link to comment
ElektraHere Posted February 10, 2006 Share Posted February 10, 2006 I don't know but if you find out let me know! I guess it is like DN says its all about what you promote towards people. As my mom says you attract more bees with honey then with vinegar. Link to comment
HaloDestroyer Posted February 10, 2006 Share Posted February 10, 2006 "sigh.......i am SO confused by this guy. i am 26. he is 37. we saw each other for about 5-6 dates back in november. i thought things were going well, though he seemed like he was getting a bit bored. then, he found out i went out with his friend for 2 dates at the same time (i made out with his friend too).....it was drama! he pushed me away and i went on vacation for a month and didnt see him." Maybe he just doesn't want to get cheated on? Hope this helps... Link to comment
teacup Posted February 10, 2006 Author Share Posted February 10, 2006 i thought men like chasing women. i thought they want to do the chasing?? Link to comment
teacup Posted February 10, 2006 Author Share Posted February 10, 2006 well......he saw me again after vacation and we had a fun date. *sniff* i like him. i miss him. Link to comment
NJRon Posted February 10, 2006 Share Posted February 10, 2006 He doesn't want to be in a comitted relationship. He wants to play the field. Link to comment
RayKay Posted February 10, 2006 Share Posted February 10, 2006 i thought men like chasing women. i thought they want to do the chasing?? Depends on the man, and it depends on the woman. Some men only like the chase aspect of a relationship. Most men only "chase" when they see the woman as worth the chase. Some people don't chase at all and come together quite naturally with someone else. Link to comment
teacup Posted February 10, 2006 Author Share Posted February 10, 2006 but he says that he doesnt date more than one woman at a time. and he's 37! i think it's sad if a guy is still trying to play games at that age. Link to comment
RayKay Posted February 10, 2006 Share Posted February 10, 2006 well......he saw me again after vacation and we had a fun date. *sniff* i like him. i miss him. I think you like him because YOU liked the chase. If I was to pull up your posts from back then, they just talked about how "cheap he was" and how disinterested he seemed, and how he did not really have any goals........ Is he really what you want in a partner, or is he just someone whom will "do"? Link to comment
teacup Posted February 10, 2006 Author Share Posted February 10, 2006 oh i dont want to marry him......no thanks. i like him but i have doubts about him. it is very confusing to me.......is it normal to like someone, yet see all their faults and have doubts about them? i dont really want to jump into anything serious right away either.....how scary. i would like to take it slow and get to know who he is. im just perplexed why he doesnt call but he suggests we do something when i call him. Link to comment
RayKay Posted February 10, 2006 Share Posted February 10, 2006 oh i dont want to marry him......no thanks. i like him but i have doubts about him. it is very confusing to me.......is it normal to like someone, yet see all their faults and have doubts about them? Not so early in a relationship! And not the big ones you seemed to see... Why force something that is not there? I don't know, in my experience you are pretty sure when you are into someone...and initially at least not seeing all their faults...but you would see red flags if you were keeping your eyes open. Link to comment
NJRon Posted February 10, 2006 Share Posted February 10, 2006 oh i dont want to marry him......no thanks. i like him but i have doubts about him. You are in it for the chase and the excitement. Not putting you down or anything, but that's how I read it. Link to comment
teacup Posted February 10, 2006 Author Share Posted February 10, 2006 bah. i just dont know him. i give up. so i am a chaser??? i didnt know girls liked chasing. Link to comment
teacup Posted February 10, 2006 Author Share Posted February 10, 2006 what's a chasee?? Link to comment
NJRon Posted February 10, 2006 Share Posted February 10, 2006 The one who likes to get chased. Link to comment
teacup Posted February 10, 2006 Author Share Posted February 10, 2006 do women confuse men as much as men confuse me??? sigh. to tell you the truth. i am so busy i dont even have time to date. sigh. so sad. i dislike men who don't call. i dislike it when they dont put in a little effort. =( Link to comment
NJRon Posted February 10, 2006 Share Posted February 10, 2006 Yes. women confuse me as much as men confuse women. I don't blame you for not liking it when they don't put in a little effort. They should! Link to comment
Msnak Posted February 10, 2006 Share Posted February 10, 2006 do women confuse men as much as men confuse me??? sigh. to tell you the truth. i am so busy i dont even have time to date. sigh. so sad. i dislike men who don't call. i dislike it when they dont put in a little effort. =( If you're too busy to date...he's too inconsistent to date...you two are doomed. I've been there. Both of you would have to make honest changes in behavior for this to have a chance. Let me ask: Are you disillusioned with the concept of getting to know one more guy? Is it too much work? Too much risk? Keep meeting awful choices? That's where I am! LOL! Link to comment
annie24 Posted February 10, 2006 Share Posted February 10, 2006 Teacup - this is the same alcoholic, cheap guy, whose life is not going anywhere, right? Don't you think you can do better than him? Link to comment
teacup Posted February 10, 2006 Author Share Posted February 10, 2006 come to think of it........i dont think he is in the same socioeconomic level as me. it's weird because he went to college and has his undergrad degree. but he just seems to be beneath my social and economic level. is that strange?? well, i am seeing lots of blue eyed blond haired boys in my college classes. that helps a bit. Link to comment
annie24 Posted February 10, 2006 Share Posted February 10, 2006 Honey - you are selling yourself short. Not only is he a drunk, loser, cheap alcoholic, but he's doesn't even chase you like mad! You deserve a guy that's excited to see you and talk to you always! And gets worried when he hasn't heard from you in a while. And calls you randomly to say hi. And does sweet things for you. And a dude who's SOBER!!!! This man is so beneath you, and there are times, it seems to me, you are putting him up on a pedestal. NO! YOU are the prize!!! Stop treating him like he's the prize. Go meet some of those blonde haired boys in your classes! Link to comment
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.