Nice guy

[david90]

Is it better to be a nice guy or a jerk in this world? Maybe it is just me, but jerks get more respect, more friends and more girls in my experience.

[sweetheart230]

Well it depends on what you mean by nice. A lot of times "nice guys" have a tendency to get walked on and be doormats. That's not cool. Being too accomadating can suggest desperation. We lose respect for people who bow down to us, so to speak.

 

Don't stop being nice, but stand up for yourself and have confidence. Jerks usually do have confidence, unfortunately, and thats what gets them the girls. Don't start being a jerk. Being yourself is definitely more attractive. But girls like guys who seem confident and some girls like guys who are bold. If you have a lot of confidence in yourself you'll do really well.

[ocrob]

I have found that everytime I show too much interest in a woman they lose interest. It is ok to be nice, but don't smother or ask for plans too much. It's weird because when you don't show much interest, then they get interested. There is this woman that I am not interested in and she will not leave me alone.

[hosswhispra]

Isn't that always the case (in regards to your above post, Ocrob). Anything that is "rare" is always sought after. I actually like "nice" guys.

 

hosswhispra

[janey17]

both of the previous posters have good points i think--

#1 - confidence is key. it doesnt mean you have to be a jerk, you should still be a nice guy if thats who you truly are... but girls do like confidence. just be yourself and it should work out okay

#2 - haha kinda like you want what you cant have... if someone pays a lot of attention you might not be interested and excited cuz you know they're alwyas there waiting to talk to you... BUT its true.. if you dont show a lot of interest in a girl, we get curious, and more interested, haha...

[BlueWolf]

I think we all tend to put a fine line between the "nice" guys and the "jerks" and we treat them each to their extremes. We assume the "jerks" are literal jerks and the "nice" guys are way too quiet with way too little self-esteem. (Then we think of the guys with the girls naturally to be jerks... not so.)

There is an area where nice guys can have lots of self-confidence. Sometimes to other guys, someone having lots of self-confidence and self-esteem from the outside (whom we don't really know) may seem to us like a jerk...

 

Not sure if what I said made sense, but I think it's true.

[Dreng3333]

I thought that too. I was the nice guy. I would be completely available to the girls I cared about at all times. Then I realised that just because you are nice doesn't mean you have to be a doormat. Like sweetheart230 and janey17 said, confidence is very imprtant. You can be nice and caring, but still show her that you have your own life. I am still just as kind to the girls as i was before, just now I have a life outside of them, I hang out with other frieds, play sports, etc. Thats what gets the girls, being nice and sweet, but still standing up for yourself and haveing some balls, so to speak.