JStone Posted January 22, 2006 Share Posted January 22, 2006 Okay so I am 19 almost 20 and my boy friend and I have been trying for a baby. Anyways, I was susposed to start my peroid Jan 17th and its now Jan 22. Yesterday morning i had a little blood, i thought my peroid was starting, but it stopped after an hour or so. ANd it still hasnt started again. 2 days ago I bought several pregnancy tests and the first and second ones there was a light line the size of a pen mark, does that mean pregnant? But I took 2 more and they were negitive. What do I do and who thinks they know what is going on? I have been feeling sick but havent vomited yet. Please write back soon. Thank You Link to comment
cichlid Posted January 22, 2006 Share Posted January 22, 2006 Periods never arrive on time. Also you are 19 (ALMOST 20) and no offense...but why are you even thinking of getting pregnant with a guy that may decide he does not want to be with your tomorrow? Also aren't there instructions on how to use the pregnancy tests when you get them? Link to comment
Hope75 Posted January 22, 2006 Share Posted January 22, 2006 It might just be that you are just pregnant and there is not enough Hcg hormine to make the test completely positive. Was the test that had the thin blue line taken with first morning's urine? That urine is more concentrated so may have more hormone so may have caused the slight blue mark. The other option is to go to your GYN and get a blood test done. Are you married? May I ask why you are trying for a baby at 19? Link to comment
Itsok Posted January 22, 2006 Share Posted January 22, 2006 Yikes dear, I wouldn't be pushing for a baby at your age. Get out and live a little first. A baby isn't a plaything, you will never be detached, and your life will be drastically different than it is now. Maybe you are trying to get pregnant so that you will be closer and always connected to your man...if that's the case, that's also not good and not true. Think this through before you get pregnant. It's not such a smart idea. Link to comment
one_old_broad Posted January 22, 2006 Share Posted January 22, 2006 Are you and your boyfriend working? How much money do you make? Do you have medical insurance? Have you looked into daycare? What are your living arrangements? Are you prepared to put your dreams and aspirations on hold in order to care for a little self-centered, hungry, noisy money pit that just keeps on getting bigger, hungrier, noisier, and more expensive as time goes by? Maybe you think I'm painting a negative picture of parenting, but if you don't go into this with your eyes wide open, you'll be in for a major case of depression and financial ruin. Children are always hungry because they're always growing, and you'll be amazed at how often you'll have to buy them new shoes and clothes. And there's always something unexpected like glasses or braces--one of my sons needed both--and serious and debilitating illness--my other son has one. If you still want to go through with this, get a lawyer and get your child support arrangements on paper. Link to comment
Dako Posted January 22, 2006 Share Posted January 22, 2006 That old broad is right. At 20, you should be havng the time of your life building your life so someday you can consider motherhood. BTW, Welcome to one old broad. I like old broads. Nice handle. Link to comment
yelloemail Posted January 22, 2006 Share Posted January 22, 2006 i agree with the others! good lord, do you want to be financially dependent on some man? go to college and get a good job where you can support yourself. what would you do if this man leaves you and you have to pay for this baby all by your self? and good luck getting child support.. Link to comment
Dako Posted January 22, 2006 Share Posted January 22, 2006 JStone, Please don't feel you're being picked on. I saw my sister end up alone with no skills and a baby at your age, and have seen countless other women in the same place. The folks here are giving you good advice based on the real world. If you think raising a baby is wonderful, imagine doing it while you attend school so you can give it a future, while your parents raise it. That's so common it's become the norm. What's the hurry? Link to comment
whatfor Posted January 22, 2006 Share Posted January 22, 2006 wow why are you people so judgmental? she just said she wants to get pregnant and nothing about her relationship. Why question her with so many personal questions? its non of your business! the only problem she described is that she has been trying to get pregnant. if you people have some issues or problems, or some certain thoughts - its all yours! doesnt mean other people must be like you. She is old enough and if she wants a baby then she wants a baby! Link to comment
Dako Posted January 22, 2006 Share Posted January 22, 2006 Maybe we really care. Perhaps this subject hits a nerve with you for personal reasons? In almost every thread, it's common to ask about details and give advice about the entire situation. You may even have done the same. Link to comment
whatfor Posted January 22, 2006 Share Posted January 22, 2006 no, i am fine. yes i believe its because you care, but really it just sounds judgmental and mean, so maybe think about what you write when you care so much. And, again, you can care about those who ASK for it, this girl asked a question about PREGNANCY, she didnt say a word about her relationship, but you all managed to ask all sort of questions, even how much they earn, gee why the heck is that your business? She is old enough to make her own decisions, and she is not THAT young for a baby. Its a perfect age, having a baby is hapiness, not the end of your life. Many friends of my sister, who is now 28, got married and had babies early after finishing universitys, and now they are all happy, still married, and live normal lives. I have a friend my age, 23, she had her first baby at 19, cause she wanted to, and now a year ago she had another baby, and she is very happy with her husband, and i wish i could have the same. But reading your replies people made me sick, i wont be surprices if this girl doesnt post again Have a good day ALL Link to comment
Dako Posted January 22, 2006 Share Posted January 22, 2006 Thanks for making those good points. I hope you stick around to balance things in this thread, especially since you disagree. In my case, I had a gut-level reaction to an unmarried 20 year old attempting motherhood that made me feel ...well..protective. Maybe you're right, she's an adult and wants a baby, and it's none of my business. A point well taken. Link to comment
whatfor Posted January 22, 2006 Share Posted January 22, 2006 Dako, there is nothing to disagree about, since the posters problem was "how to get pregnant" or "am i pregnant" and not "is it ok for me to get pregnant at my age with my bf who might leave me the same how any partner can leave you at any age". You said you just all asked details, but no, asking details would be "how light was the line on the test?" or "what color was it?", not "how much do you earn?" Link to comment
Itsok Posted January 22, 2006 Share Posted January 22, 2006 Whatfor, we are all welcome to say what we like, and sometimes people won't like it. Welcome to being on a forum asking for advice. She is physically old enough to have a baby, absolutely. However, she has to expect to have some negative reaction when she says "me and my boyfriend" and being under the age of 20. For the most part, people who are NOT MARRIED and want children with someone are doing it for the wrong reasons. Most people her age are terrified of becoming pregnant and with good reason. Being financially & emotionally responsible enough at that age is such a rare thing it's easy to assume the worst. If we've offended anyone by our comments, I'm sure we're all sorry. Myself, I gave my comments because I do not believe that people who are that young and not married should have a child. It's not fair to the child, and it's not fair to the young people who have hardly started their lives. But may I also add, you didn't answer her question either, only gave a negative response to all the other posters. I'm surprised this struck such a nerve for you really. Hope everyone is happier now. Link to comment
Dako Posted January 22, 2006 Share Posted January 22, 2006 Whatfor, I agree. If the majority of young unwed mothers I've known were as happy as the ones you mentioned, I'd have a different point of view. That's why it's good to have you here. I've never had kids, but I've changed diapers and worried about kids. Kids whose parents had problems being parents. Some things color our opinions most vividly. Link to comment
Hope75 Posted January 22, 2006 Share Posted January 22, 2006 gee why the heck is that your business? I think because the OP posted a situation on a public forum. The responders realize what she asked but given the little information we had to go on, they asked more questions. I'm sure that some young unwed moms do just fine, but there are many more who don't and who have no idea what they've gotten themselves into, and my guess is that the people who posted questions of concerns for the OP know someone who went through it or went through it themselves and are simply asking the OP if, at age 19, and being unwed, she and her boyfriend have really thought this through. No reason for feathers to get ruffled. Link to comment
whatfor Posted January 22, 2006 Share Posted January 22, 2006 la la la.. i have said what i think and i know i am right, again, because the person asked about pregnancy, not about relationships and life problems. so i am out of this thread. And i hope she has a healthy baby and a happy family. Link to comment
annie24 Posted January 22, 2006 Share Posted January 22, 2006 Okay so I am 19 almost 20 and my boy friend and I have been trying for a baby. Anyways, I was susposed to start my peroid Jan 17th and its now Jan 22. Yesterday morning i had a little blood, i thought my peroid was starting, but it stopped after an hour or so. ANd it still hasnt started again. 2 days ago I bought several pregnancy tests and the first and second ones there was a light line the size of a pen mark, does that mean pregnant? But I took 2 more and they were negitive. What do I do and who thinks they know what is going on? I have been feeling sick but havent vomited yet. Please write back soon. Thank You Ok, well, to answer your question, most pregnancy tests can't give you a true positive or negative until 5 days after your missed period (that's today.) But, like hope mentioned, if you are pregnant, the pregnancy hormone (HCG) may not be at high enough levels in your body yet. If you want to know for certain, book an appointment with a doctor. Have you been taking prenatal vitamins? On another note, yes, I would advise anyone having a baby, from a 19 year old unmarried woman, to a 28 year old married woman, to a 42 year old woman, to really think about how they will raise the baby. Money doesn't grow on trees for anyone. It's especially a precarious situation if you are so young and your boyfriend hasn't made a life-long committment to you. Of course, the 28 year old's husband can just as easily run out on her. Babies take A LOT of money. It's estimated that to raise a child, from birth to the age of 18, it takes $200,000. Just something to think about.... Link to comment
teacup Posted January 22, 2006 Share Posted January 22, 2006 i wouldnt apologize for addressing concerns and issues about money and child support and marriage and such. if a person isnt able to deal and face these very realistic concerns that have relevance to pregnancy, then is that person really ready to get pregnant? in my opinion, if you want to get pregnant, you have to be able to look and deal with such issues headlong because like it or not these issues crop up after the baby is born. might as well look at it beforehand, that's just common sense. but excuse me, apparently common sense isnt always common. Link to comment
JStone Posted January 22, 2006 Author Share Posted January 22, 2006 Okay so like 2 of you tried to answer my question. The others were just arguing. Well to answer your question, I come from a VERY wealthy family so money isnt a issue...I am engaged to my one and only and he wants a child just as badly as i do. Please stop bickering among yourself and help me answer the questions that i put on the table. Thank you Link to comment
whatfor Posted January 22, 2006 Share Posted January 22, 2006 hey JStone, the best thing you can do is do some tests at the doctors, because there can and can not be any morning sickness and the same about home tests, they dont give you a 100% answer Link to comment
cichlid Posted January 22, 2006 Share Posted January 22, 2006 Dako, there is nothing to disagree about, since the posters problem was "how to get pregnant" or "am i pregnant" and not "is it ok for me to get pregnant at my age with my bf who might leave me the same how any partner can leave you at any age". You said you just all asked details, but no, asking details would be "how light was the line on the test?" or "what color was it?", not "how much do you earn?" My reply then came accross bad (you sort of referred to it)...because I do not think it is teh best for ANY child to be born when two individuals are not married (my opinion) and of course purposely. If it was an accident then well at least they did not abort the child. I do not think sex belongs outside of marriage but again that is my opinion. And her age makes me scared because of the fact she probably does not have a college education. To me this attempt at her trying to become pregnant is not a good idea. Link to comment
annie24 Posted January 22, 2006 Share Posted January 22, 2006 hey JStone, the best thing you can do is do some tests at the doctors, because there can and can not be any morning sickness and the same about home tests, they dont give you a 100% answer Exactly. Additionally, no one here can tell you if you are pregnant or not. Different people have different symptoms. 2 days ago, one woman on here posted that she didn't know she was pregnant until her 5th month when she felt her baby kick!!! Obviously, we are strangers over the internet, not a reliable pregnancy exam. You may be pregnant, you may not be. Best to go to a doctor. Link to comment
yelloemail Posted January 23, 2006 Share Posted January 23, 2006 i agree. the world is a tough place especially if you are a single mom with no education and no work experience/skills. however, you do have the free will to do as you choose. good luck with your future pregnancy Link to comment
JStone Posted January 23, 2006 Author Share Posted January 23, 2006 Well to answer you all i took 2 more tests today and they were positives, so i am having a baby! Link to comment
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