i need advice badly, its tearing me apart inside

[hcochick]

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[novaseeker]

You do need to tell him. If you don't you are just living a lie, sad to say. It's his decision to make if he wants to remain with you if you are having sex with other people behind his back.

 

I'm not going to be harsh, but let's face it: you've had sex with 2 other people while you've been his GF, one of those times was hot on the heels of sex with your BF(!) ... if I were you I would question why you are in this relationship. What I mean is: if your BF's sexual performance issues are causing problems for you (and my guess is they are .. one of the instances of cheating was bc he wasn't satisfying you a few minutes beforehand, and the other one seems to have been bc you couldn't resist the great sex, probably in comparison to the sex you have with your BF), then it's best you have a different relationship.

 

But in any case, you're treating him badly, and you know that. He has the right to know what you've done so he can decide what he wants to do.

[RayKay]

Yes, you would be better off being honest and risking losing him.

 

I notice you really may express guilt, but you are not really showing remorse or taking much responsibility for your actions. You can't feel that bad if you do it again. And even talk about how "great it was".

 

Sex does not "just happen" and it's not a matter of "the next thing I know we were having sex"....you chose to continue on with things, to kiss him, take your clothes off, whatever. You even cheated right after being with your boyfriend?

 

His sexual problems (the guy is what, 17 or 18...pretty normal at that age to be a bit "premature") do not excuse it.. communication is crucial and the answer. Not cheating. You do not fix problems by running to others. Nor does the fact they are ex's make it ANY better.

 

People do NOT accidentally cheat. These other guys penis's did not ACCIDENTALLY fall into your vagina.

 

Your boyfriend deserves a girlfriend he can trust, and feel safe with. One who is cheating as much as you have, is certainly not being respectful to him, and you are jeopardizing HIS health as much as your own.

 

Honestly, and this will be harsh, but I hope he DOES leave you, as he certainly deserves better, and you need to learn some valuable lessons about respect and love. A relationship is not all about you. And until you can stay committed to someone, don't get involved. It's a good sign they are both not right for you, and also that you have some maturing to do.

[Day_Walker]

I think you should look at this situation and read more into the situation that you arent ready to have a serious relationship at this point.

[kinabarbie18]

Hi! Let me tell you I know how you feel. I have cheated on my husband on several occasions, but I did it out of spite and immaturity because I feel to this day he deserves it for all the horrible things he has done. I know I could personally never tell my husband (even after we are divorced) that I had cheated on him. In your case, your b/f has never done anything wrong, as far as I can see. I, in your situation would probaly tell him, because he had never done anything to deserve it. It will hurt you and him more in the long run to keep that inside you.

[acuraman]

I think you should let your b/f know what you have been doing. From what I have read, maybe its best for you to be single and do your own thing so you don't feel so guilty about your actions.

[Relationship Coach]

Honestly, and this will be harsh, but I hope he DOES leave you, as he certainly deserves better, and you need to learn some valuable lessons about respect and love. A relationship is not all about you. And until you can stay committed to someone, don't get involved. It's a good sign they are both not right for you, and also that you have some maturing to do. __________________

 

 

NOW BEND OVER GRAB YOUR ANKLES WHILE WE ALL SPANK YOU!

 

Seriously, you need to quit this destructive behavior and learn to control your urges. Masterbate if you have to but stop screwing up the lives of others. Tell your BF, face the music and what's left of your reputation.

[darkblue]

You don't deserve him.

You are also increasing his chances of contracting a STD. Your chances are significantly increased, but you should have thought of that.

 

If you wanted a better sexual experience - you could have used sex toys, manual stimulation, etc.

But sleeping with other people, because you are not getting what you want from your partner is not an excuse.

Tell him the truth, or live with it on your conscience.

 

Time to face the music.

And maybe while you are out of that relationship, because he should leave you - you could consider why you don't feel that committment is such a vital thing in a relationship...

[yeawutever]

Ok, I won't be harsh anymore, but indeed he does need to know wut u did. It isn't fair for for him that this be keep a lying secret, b/c not only would u be lying but he would be at risk in contacting an STD's from u. But really, if u feel u r gonna be doing this behavior again, then why r u in a relation. And if u can't figure out ur issue ur having, if ur gonna be sleeping around, consider counseling. I really doubt ur b/f is gonna forgive u after all that, but either way, whether he does or does not, u'll relieve of pain and time. But really, if he does forgive u, be prepare for all the sleepless and miserable nights he'll spent for the rest of his life worrying if u'll give him an STD and who r u with. Do u really want that? But, like I say before, I don't think he's likely to work it out, if he leaves u, maybe it was meant to be like that, neither of u really deserve each other.

[versat_il]

If you love your boyfriend then tell him the bitter truth and face the music but be a smart girl and make your own music. Tell him you love him, and that you are sorry for what you are about to admit. Tell him about your huge sexual appetite and start working WITH him CONSTRUCTIVLY on that. There’s plenty of info out on the net about how’s and ho to and I also reckon you know your way around. But enough with the blaming already it’s making ME feel bad!

If you love him and he loves you back you will find your own ways around the issue, but first of all you have to admit the problem and do something about it.

Just admitting and sleeping with other guys won’t do.

[goingmadithink]

I feel bad for u but mainly ur b/f who msut know wut kind of gal he's dating. Not to blunt and straight forwards but if u can't keep ur legs close and have a huge sexual appetide, then why even bother being in a relation. Do this: Tell ur b/f wut u done, and then go on saying "I don't really love u and if given the chance, I would sleep with another guy". It would take him like 3 sec before u gets all ur beginnings out and kicks u to the curb cuz really that's where u belong.