guys - would this freak you out?

[colbysweet]

Lately I have been really emotional and scared of losing my boyfriend. Even though things are going great between us. It's almost like it's going so great that I am scared of it ending.

 

Anyhow, I haven't told him this as I didn't want to make a deal out of something that might have passed. But today while we were making love, I started crying. I started crying because it was so intense, it brought up the issues I have been dealing with.

 

Of course we stopped, and I explained it all to him. He said he didn't really understand, as he never thinks about things like that when things are going so well. But he reassured me that I need not worry about losing him, and that I shouldn't dwell on things ending when I don't even know they will... and if they do.... that's something we get to when it happens.

 

Anyhow. I know that it would be a little weird, your girlfriend crying during sex because she loves you so much. So I was wondering if it would be something to freak you out? Like, do you think it could come accross as though I am a little obsessive.

[doblersdream]

Hi Colbysweet

 

Is there any reasons why you think your relationship may end? Has your bf expressed any discontent, or do you think it's just you being afraid of losing a good thing?

 

It's obvious that you have deep feelings for your bf. Only one person in my life have i had that intense, emotional connection with, and i know how intoxicating it can be. It is a fact though, that relationships develop through many stages, and so do your emotions towards our partners.

 

My advice would be to enjoy the moment, every moment, and not think too much about the future. If you love each other, then things will take care of themselves.

[winkie]

Darling, you need to relax or else you may scare him and lose him. He seems like a nice guy by reassuring you of how he feels. Are you afraid of being hurt? Is this your first real love? You cant be afraid of something ending. You need to forget these thoughts because you are going to be taken back by these insecurities that you are going to miss a good thing. Life is to short go with the flow.

[charmed]

Hey Colbysweet !

 

If hes a nice guy, you needn't worry about the incident during your love making. Thats all about being comfortable in the first place and any guy that cares about you would put your feelings first - especially at a time where you are most open and vulnerable.

 

Your insecurities about the relationship may lie inside insecurities about yourself. Do you really love yourself - cause if you do, your bf will love you as much - theres no reason for him to not love you who you are. Learn to relax and not feel so threatened about loosing him.

 

If he felt like you do, would that make you love him any less ? Think of why you are with him - and think what you would say if he said the same thing to you. He is very understanding by the sounds of it, so you should relax and you both will be able to work this through. Most importantly though, learn to love yourself

 

Good luck there !

 

Charmed.

[colbysweet]

Thanks for the replies.

 

I have no reason to believe that our relationship might end anytime in the near future. (after all who can tell the future) It's just my first real love, and I'm scared of losing something great.

 

I now feel much better about the situation, I think that my problem was letting it bottle up inside of me, and it got to the point where I couldn't hide it from him anymore. I was scared of looking stupid, because I personally thought how emotional I was getting over it was quite silly.

 

I know that I have to be careful not to scare him off - but on the other hand, I do believe also, that I am a little insecure, and if he does love me for who I am, this should not play a MAJOR part in our relationship, when everything else is going so well.

 

I am seeing him tonight; so I am going to explain to him that things are feeling much better now I have gotten it out, and that it was the fact I hadn't said anything that let it get to this point. Also, I want to make sure he knows it not me being obsessive, it's just me dealing with how I feel about him as it's my first time.

 

My boyfriend is pretty level headed and secure. Things like this really don't phase him..... so I should start from now in being more secure, and thinking that this is not such a big deal!