Does anyone else ever have this anxiety post break up?...

[freeindeed]

...I've been doing fine so far, but I feel like I'm "waiting" for the ball to drop. Like I'm waiting to hear some horrible news that he's met someone else, or waiting for him to call me to tell me he misses me.

 

I hate this feeling. I definitely don't want to get back together with him. It was a long, stressful, painful roller coaster of a relationship, and I don't want to go through it again...yet there's still apart of me that doesn't want to be alone. Thankfully, I do have enough sense to know for a FACT that it will never work out between the two of us...but I can't explain why I have this anxiety. I just want it to go away. How long does it take to stop caring? How long will it take until I don't wonder whether or not he's online?

 

Any advice on how to stop "waiting"? Or how to make this feeling go away. Is this normal? Has anyone had a similar experience?

 

Thanks in advance

[Relationship Coach]

Stop focusing on him and what he is doing, focus on yourself. Getting over him will take time, everyone heals at different speeds. Find new things to occupy your time with and don't worry about where he is, who is he with and what are they doing.

 

It sounds cruel but you need to picture him having passionate sex with someone who you really hate and let that settle in. Prepare yourself to deal with this because sooner or later he will be with someone else and they will have sex. You will hate this person whether you know them or not.

 

The pain of moving on is not as great as the pain of the constant wondering and waiting for the other shoe to fall. Focus on your life, your happiness and exercise him from your soul like a demon so your previous relationship wont wreck your future ones. You have accepted the fact that it will never work, so accept the fact that whatever he is doing can't and won't bother you. Stay strong and move forward.

[notmyself24]

Hunny,

 

Its better to be alone than hurting. Feel better & things will improve. peace.

[novaseeker]

It will take time to recover. The best that can be done is to focus on other things in your life. Do not spend time sitting around mulling these thoughts over. Get out and do things, get with your friends, get with your hobbies and interests, your work and so forth, and reconnect with things you like to do. It's a time to focus on yourself and stay active and involved, and not to dwell on him or what he is doing. Don't give yourself the time to do that, and the healing will go more easily for you. I wish you the best in this.

[Hawk]

Great advice about not thinking about what they are doing - you will always imagine the worst and it then keeps playing in your brain on an endless loop. I have taken up the idea of wearing a thick rubber band on my wrist and when I find myself drifting into this territory I give at a good snap - great aversion therapy!!