I cant win, and nothing i can do.....help

[bblumps]

me and my ex-girlfriend are best mates in the whole world, but i still love her and i cant help it. i think she still feels the same about me to but she still wants to date this other guy. this guy is suposed to be my friend, well he hangs out with me and all my mates but he dont like me much. he has told her that if she wants him then she cant talk to me or be my friend even. she wont be the puppet to him but she wont want to piss him off either will she. it gets more complicated by the fact that only me and her no that we are best mates and see each over more than we let on to the rest of our mates. this is something i have had to lie about to my mates so that she doesnt hate me. i love her more than anything and she knows that i will always be there for he no matter what.

i think thats about everything. so the question is how can i get her back?

[luke2005]

I say move on my friend your still young and u will feel like this again but with some1 who treats u with respect and who is proud of you!! She wants her cake and 2 eat it!

[bblumps]

if only it was that simple. ive tried and tried agen, but i cant. ive tried lookin at other girls but that dont seem to make a difference either. should i just wait and see if she realises how gd i am 2 her and 4 her?

[luke2005]

You sound u have it bad, i have been through exactly same situation twice, if u cant walk away, u need to ignore her so she realises how much she misses u keep her guessing and always b nice but not over mushy, she will cum running, and if she dont then she seriously is not the 1 for you!! Trust me it will work a treat!!

[Serendipity1607307077]

She and you both have the right to be friends with whoever you want. If her boyfriend can't handle it, then he has issues he needs to deal with. She shouldn't have to tip toe around him, and neither should you.

 

If you are best friends, you should ACT like best friends. Boyfriends and best friends are two completely different entities anyway.

 

As far as having a relationship goes, it's evident she wants to date other guys, so maybe you should just focus on being friends.. If anything develops from there, wonderful - if not, it's no biggie.. at least you are still friends.

[ducky]

Wonderfully logical advice Serendipity. Really mature as well.

 

I just have a point to make about the second part,

 

if not, it's no biggie.. at least you are still friends.

 

I used to think like you. That was until I fell for a good friend. It's a pity she didn't return my feelings and all of a sudden, we aren't even talking much anymore.

 

I don't know about others, but personally I find it hard to restore that magical friendship you once had with someone of the opposite gender, if you happen to fall for her and she doesn't return your feelings. It's hard to be friends like you were yesterday.

 

Bblumps, I symphatise with you completely. That feeling - you love her so much, but yet she doesn't return your feelings, and this thing complicated by the fact that you want to keep your best friend status.

 

Well my advice is simple, tell her how you feel, if she doesn't feel the same about you, move on. It will be difficult to have the same close friendship you used to have with her, but I hope it will work out for you in the end.

 

I've talked to many girls regarding your question -- is it possible that she will one day fall for you? Definitely, that has happened before. But don't put your hopes too high. Even if that day comes, it will be months, if not, years down the road.

 

Regards,

[Serendipity1607307077]

Thanks Ducky!

 

I know where you are coming from in that sense too - that feeling of rejection remains there and puts a stain on something that would otherwise be a really good friendship..

 

A lot of people can laugh this kind of thing off and it is no skin off their noses.. others have it in the back of their minds, and it does affect the friendship... it's quite sad when that sort of thing happens... but I guess the best thing to do if you can't be together in a relationship, that you do your best to keep the friendship fresh and alive.. especially if it's someone you have a real connection to and share a lot in common with..

[bblumps]

thanks all for your advice, its much apreciated. what is it suposed to mean if she knows how she feels about everyone else but she has no idea how she feels about me. also when i try and ask her there is a great deal of tension in the air.