No Lovin

[kelldude69]

well...my girlfriend and i have been together for 2 years now... we used to have sex like every night but the past few months it has been pretty nonexistant...in the past 2 months we've had sex twice...is there anything i can do to maybe spice things up a bit??? how about an open relationship?? i dunno.... i love her with all my heart but this is really getting to be a problem... any advice here would be greatly appreciated...thanks for reading

[yokohama_mama]

What does she say when you mention the lack of sex?

 

Was there any event that happened a few months ago that could explain the change?

[RandomAdvisor]

Have you tried talking to her about this? Don't do it when you're in a situation where you'd normally be having sex and you might be a little upset. Pick a neutral moment during the day and bring it up.

[darkblue]

Hi - and welcome to eNotAlone.

 

Have a look around the 'Sex and Romance' forum for ideas on how you could spice it up. But first of all you have to talk to her.

[kelldude69]

i've tried talking to her about it but we always end up in a big argument.. she says that she is too tired and doesn't have time..

[RayKay]

Well if she says she is too tired all the time and does not "have time" and is not willing to make time (I mean I assume you two spend some time together, how much time do you need?) then there is little you can do if she is unwilling to communicate about it and discuss it.

 

How is the relationship other than the sex?

 

You may also have to decide whether you are sexually compatible or not - in long term relationships there will be periods of time where sex may be less frequent, however once a month is definitely VERY VERY infrequent, and often it may be due to low libidos, stress, hormones, illnesses, lack of emotional feeling and so on...however it is up to you as a couple to work together on this. If one of you is unwilling, it's sometimes best to move on rather than drag it out for a much longer period of time. Sex is not everything, but it is something, and if someone seems to not want to work on that aspect, what is going to happen when other difficult situations arise.

 

I suggest you read some other threads in this forum about this issue, there are several of them.

[Day_Walker]

There is a reason why the sex has stopped, your job is to find it out.

[heloladies21]

That open relationship never works. Just a prelude to eventual break up. Sounds likie she's losing interest. I'd have one good convo about it with her, but if things don't change, might be time to call it quits.

[darkblue]

That open relationship never works. Just a prelude to eventual break up.

 

Is that personal experience?

[DN]

If she won't talk about the problem and will not deal with it in any way - and you have tried several times, gently and patiently, to find out what is wrong you may have to consider ending the relationship. It won't get better if she won't accept that there is a problem.

[mccarleighp]

try new things in the bedroom that should get things back on track