I do I feel jealous?

[cichlid]

Or maybe I feel sad. My BF and I hung out today. I studied at his apartment until this thing we go to on Wednesdays. Well, when we get there, I discovered he invited his best friend to come to the church activity. Of course, back at the apartment he had been telling me I need to start talking with other people and making friends at church. I do have friends, just not at church. I don't feel comfortable and all the people I knew last year don't come any more. I'm just shy really. Very shy! Except in my classes...for some reason I can chat a lot to random people. But is that a reason for him to completely ignore me in public? In fact, when we are at church any time he is always talking with other people and ignoring me. Yeah, it makes me sad. Today it made me jealous and I realize I don't have any good friends at church.

 

Maybe it's because I never felt welcome when I was a kid. I mean at church I was always ignored by many when I was younger. Just picked on a lot...I would chat with people and be friendly and they would just look at me like I was a freak. I think I was because I was homeschooled as a child. I was fine after junior year of highschool...then I started to feel more welcome at church things. Now that I'm in college and stuff, I still feel really shy. I probably will open up later in the semester. I dunno why I don't feel comfortable...but that's a guess.

 

Back to the real reason for my post. I just feel so unloved around my own BF when we are doing anything that isn't just me and him. I mean I realize he shouldn't just be talking to me. He should be social with others. But completely ignoring me is sort of rude. I even left and I don't think he thought I was really leaving. I just didn;t feel like sitting around for an hour listening to a boring guy while my BF completely avoided me for the evening. Not even sitting near me. He came out as I was starting up my car and I even had to ask him for a hug.

 

Back at the apartment earlier he kept joking around about how he wanted to break up with me. Just joking about how he was falling in love with a good friend's ex GF...how he feels like he is going to loose control and hurt me...and other things that could be reasons to break up with me. I guess that whole joking around he did got me thinking what if he really wants to break up with me.

 

I dunno I guess I just feel...ignored and like he doesn't like me anymore. Yesterday he also said he was going to study and didn;t want me to call. I did later just to say good night. He had invited his friends over.

[Amannamederic]

this sounds...suspicious, watch him closer over the next week or so, if instances like the joking around and the studying come to light, or if he always wants to go out to places with other people to talk to and never one on one with you...im going to say he wants out.

 

How jokingly was he talking about it? like was he laughing? or did he say it in seriousness, pause, then say "just kidding".

[cichlid]

How jokingly was he talking about it? like was he laughing? or did he say it in seriousness, pause, then say "just kidding".

Says it seriously, with a straight face. A very long pause...and then the "just kidding".

 

We've only been together for 3 weeks today...exactly. We were good friends before that for 7 months (over the summer we were best friends though).

 

He hangs out with friends and I am fine with that. As long as he doesn't lie to me. I also hate feeling like the third wheel when I am in public with him.

[ReadyorNot]

Well... my fiance sometimes kinda ignores me when we are around his friends.... when I mention it to him, he says he doesnt mean to ignore me so I should join in the conversations. Usually I stand around behind him, or if we are at these "car meets" I sit in the car... So its partically my fault. Well... alot my fault.

 

But I am concerned how you say your BF was joking around saying he wanted to break up with you and that he is falling in love with a friends ex? What is up with that? I would freak on my fiance if he ever said anything to me like that...

[cichlid]

It isn't making me freak out that much, but it is causing me to doubt his feelings toward me. Maybe I'm negative, but I keep thinking of how this guy (not my BF...a friend) sexually harassed me and then how this other guy led me one. The thoughts are coming back. I dunno...I guess it's because I hate being hurt and I think I am going to be.