If i could just turn back time

[zita]

It all happened one month ago. I broke up with my boyfriend because i realized the relationship was not working out and he is not really the one for me. I met this guy, he is studying the same degree as me and my ex but i have never got to know him until now. I realized he had just broken up with his girlfriend whom he really loved but it was a distant relationship, they had been together for more than 2 years. He was never an outgoign and sociable guy until recently he kept on finding me knowing that i have broken up with my bf. In the beginngin i thought he was playing along having a rebound relationship but at the end I was right except that I have really started to like him. All of a sudden things started to get confusing, he stopped to take notice of me and started to get interested in other girls, i was really disappointed. My girlfriend kept warning me he was just a player and not a guy to worth my attention but somehow i understood he was very hurt deep inside. I confessed to him that i like him and he told me there was no chemistry between us and i am not his type. Being rejected was upsetting but at least he didn't lie to me. I hope this could be the end of the story but i ended up doing somehting stupid. Two days after he asked if i could just be his rebound, i knew it was going to be a sacarifical relationship but i said i ddin't mind because i really like him. We talked alot about his ex and he mentioned how much he really does miss her and is trying very hard to forget her. He said he is afriad he is never able to find the ONE he really love but when i asked if he had ever liked me he said i don't love you but i do have feelings for you. I think am too Naive, this is the part i hate to tell and admit and i keep on teling myself it didn't happened but it did. We had sex. I knew it, i was being used and i knew men are different from women. I was emotionally attached whereas he wanted to do it so he could feel better. We were never really together and that is what i will call casual, but i can't believe i have done it with someone who seems to be obvious just after sex. after 2 days he said nothing was working out and he felt guilty after sex and can't force any chemistry between us. he felt pressure to like me didn't know if he had really liked me at all. what can i do about it, i agreed to take part of this casual realtionship knowing it will not work out. I thought i colud play it cool and not to have any emotions atthaced but I am. I feel S lutty, dirty and worthless, i have only hope he could pay a little attention to me and start to like me, i guess i have been silly all the way. Everything happened within one month, it was just too quick like a dream.

 

Is there anything i should do? i see him everyday at univerisity and i feel bad whenever i see him but at the same time i want him to notice me hopefully will take the iniative to chase me back. My girlfrd keeps on tellign me just to get a life.

 

I don't know, I need some advices, please anyone?

[loveydovey]

If you're not a glutton for punishment, then I say end it. Why voluntarily subject yourself to feelings of worthlessness and inadequacy ? Please don't do that. You deserve better.

 

The fact that he was upfront with you should have given you the motivation to say "Hey, I'm not anyone's rebound". Instead, it seems as if you just got so swept away by it. You come accross as a very smart and perceptive young lady. So I would say please proceed as such. It's just that I don't like to hear about people viewing themselves as something they're not .

 

And since you said all of this has been just for a month, I'd say it shouldn't be so hard for you when you tell him it's over. Because think about it this way, while he's using your 'rebound relationship' to get over his ex and heal his wounds, tell me who is going to heal yours? It needs to be you, hun

HTH!