Said some things

[Someonewhoneedshelp]

Well I just need to say this to someone and i can't reach any of my friends for advice. My girlfriend broke up with me today. It was kind of out of the blue. I mean just friday everything seemed fine between us. I am in kansas right now visiting my folks for 2 more weeks and then i would be back in texas where i live. She kept goin on how she missed me and all that. Well yesterday, the 18th, marked the month aniversary in which i asked her out. I never kept track on how long we went out, i mean if someone asked me i could answer it but i just never kept track. And apparently people are suppose to at least say "happy aniversary" or something after a month of dating, i never heard of it, so i didnt say anything and she got mad. After trying to tell her that i was just ignorant people ever did anything over that she just said let it go because theres nothing i can do to make it better. so the next day..today, she calls me and says she wants to break up because she doesn't like how our relationship is going or whatever, but she said "i do like you alot and i enjoy hanging out with you but i just dont want to do the boyfriend/girlfriend thing anymore" Needless to say i was a bit pissed off at the sudden mood swing and rash action. I didnt say anything yet, so i just said "fine" and hung up before i did. I then called her back 30 minutes later, she didnt answer so i left a message letting her know that i guess i cant help how she feels, and i didnt mean to hang up like that she didnt deserve it, but i was and still am pissed off.

 

The answering machine cut me off and so i got on instant messneger and she was on away, so i said...more. I really wish i didnt say what i said. but i went on saying how could she do something like this, everyting be so peachy and fine a few days ago to an all of a sudden change of mood. I was also talking to my friend, and he told me that girls usually break up with guys when they are on vacation when they found someone else. I dont know if thats true or not but i didnt care at the time i thought it was a good enough so i told her that. (but i only did because someone told me that she was cheating on me with her ex boyfriend, whom she dated for almost a year last year. she said she wasnt and that she was truly offended someone would say that..which honestly now i find hard to believe considering her extremely 'tease' like nature. but still i dont know for sure if she is or not so i shouldnt have said that). and well its been a few hours since she broke up with me and i have cooled down a bit and i feel really regretful that i would say all those things. Right now she thinks i am stupid and an A-hole, and i know its too late to take back what i said, but would there be any advice on what i could do to possibly...let her know i didnt mean it? I only got mad because when she broke up with me i felt lied too, she said all these things like she really liked me and was starting to fall in love but if she truly felt that way she wouldnt have broken up with me.

[sidehop]

If she really is breaking up with you over the 'anniversary' deal it's pretty childish. But given her past and the way she's easily able to end a relationship like that there may be more reason and to me she doesn't sound like a person worth dating. She doesn't sound too stable in my opinion.

 

What you've said is already done but I would give it some time and see if she would talk to you again and go from there...if not let her go & the truth will come out one day. Wish you the best

[Someonewhoneedshelp]

Well truth is you are EXACTLY right, she is not very emotionally stable, she breaks down alot, and she said she was scared of getting close to me because of what happened to her before. Well i guess she made up her mind, i no longer want to date her now that i look at her from a single point of view. She is pretty childish, i know but i chose to look past that becuase i thought i could help her become more 'stable' and grow up a bit. Oh well, but i still am not hte type of guy to deliberatly be an A-hole and hurt peoples feelings, and i feel bad for doing that.

[sidehop]

That's good you see her in an honest way. Unstable girls draw too much attention and drama in their lives that will take many peoples' time. Don't know if I'm allowed to say a-hole here but you're being the honest a-hole. You're not being mean but you're being honest...I'm sure if you leave her alone for awhile she'll likely try to come back to you.

[Someonewhoneedshelp]

thanks alot man you have been killer help. I express my most grateful gratitude.

[sidehop]

That's what we all are here for, give insights from our own experience...and of course get help when in need

[heloladies21]

You've learned from your mistakes pretty quick about controling yourself when you get mad so lesson learned. But don't prevent yourself from being mad about the break up. She hurt you and it's ok to be angry. For now, just let it cool off and play things cool. I don't think you're a jerk and you shouldn't be concerned with what she thinks. Go No Contact and do other things like talk to other girls.

 

Just don't become her friend. If you did, then you messed up!