changing my name?

[greenmint]

i want to change my first name because i dont like it and i dont identify with it.

 

i always want to cringe because i feel it's not me. yet i answer to the name.

 

what should i do?

 

won't it be weird if i change it?? how do i deal with friends/family/other ppl about this? how do i handle this?

[DN]

For some reason my sister was always called by her second name rather than her first. When she was 13 she decided she preferred her first name and asked everybody to call her by that name. Obviously, it took a while for people to get used to it, but the way she handled it was to not answer when somebody used the old one. Eventually everybody got it - except for one of my aunts.

 

Choose the name you like and tell everyone that's what you want to be known as. Just remember that on official documents you will have to use the name on your birth certificate unless you change it legally.

 

There is no law that says you have to use your given name, you just can't use a false one for fraudulent purposes.

[mairi]

usin another name to just be identified with friends nd family is a gd idea, i had the same problem, i hate my name, luckily 4 me my real name is spelt marie so this is wot i call myself......it is actually pronounced mar-ree!! can ur name be shortened or does it have any similar names which u prefer??? these cud be gd 2 consider.

[greenmint]

im afraid and i have a little bit of a mind block about it.

 

i have a name that i was born with and which my family calls me by.

 

and then i "picked" a english name so that i would have one. this was years ago and obviously i was young and stupid and randomly picked.

 

now i really don't like it. i like my name that i was born with BUT do not want strangers and ppl, who aren't close to me calling me by that name.

 

so i have to find another english name. i feel scared and depressed when i think about it. i guess im afraid ppl will ridicule me or think im stupid or weird for changing it. i hate it when ppl talk bad about me and they've done this alot. this is where the discomfort comes from.

 

what do you guys think i should do? how should i think about this? what action should i consider?

 

thanks for your advices.

[DN]

I think you should care less about what other people think and moe about what you think. If you act with confidence, people will accept most things you decide you want to change about yourself.

[darkblue]

I agree with DN.

 

The only people that use my real first name [the one on my birth certificate], are people like, banks, letters etc.

 

Everyone else knows me by my nick-name.

 

If you're not comfortable with it, tell people you would like to be known as something else. There's no use being called something you don't like.

 

If you really want to get it changed legally; then do it.

 

It would, however, cause inconvience changing passports etc.

[RayKay]

Do what you feel....I love my name personally as it fits me, but if you don't feel a fit for yourself, go for it.

 

I knew a girl that changed her first name in the 10th grade, it was confusing for a while as I had known her a long time, but eventually everyone caught on and it was normal to do. I also had an aunt do the same thing.

 

Just tell everyone, and don't respond to the other name. Tell them it is your second name or something and that you chose to change it for personal reasons..and leave it there. If they tease you, try and let it brush off, if you don't show it bothers you, they will lose interest in it. In time, they will convert to the new name

 

Sometimes people change them due to negative associations with the name (named after a terrible relative) or because they don't "feel it".

 

It is a big decision, so make you want to do it, but do choose carefully as it would be a hassle to do it all over again...hehe.

[sisterlynch]

If you can, talk with your family about it. Your parents may be able to explain why they picked it, that would give you some insight into how they would feel if you changed it.

 

Tell them how you feel when you are called by that name...

[Hope75]

I have a friend who had his name changed officially in court. He is gay, and our hometown was really unaccepting of him, high school was torture and it got worse afterwards, he was jumped while taking out his trash and assualted by 4 men. This was one of several incidents that made his life really miserable.

 

He changed his first and last name and moved accross the country, where he is now thriving. He just felt he needed to leave every part of this place including how he was identified, in order to escape his pain and try to be happy.

 

Think carefully about why you want to do it, make sure it is for you and not for anyone else. Remember that you will always be you, regardless of your name.

 

We had a hard time at first adjusting to my friend's "new" name, but that was about 10 years ago, and now to think of his "old" name, I don't even remember who that was anymore.