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3 months to reframe...


Sindy_0311

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1 hour ago, Sindy_0311 said:

Just been thinking today, every Monday, when I pick up my son at school for my week of custody, he wears the exact same clothes as the previous week when I dropped him at his dads. I know he puts him the same clothes on just to make me understand that isn’t to acceptable to mix his stuff. And surely because the clothes I buy are less fancy… my son already told me… 
i feel so ashamed 

edit: I wonder how my son perceives this: “look this is your uniform for mummy’s week… “ 

Please -don't go there - please.  Raise your son to know the value of a dollar, to know what's really important. Fancy for a boy? Why? They grow so fast!

LOL to make you laugh - when my son was young for certain field trips we had to send a nonperishable lunch -no ice packs or lunch box - disposable bag.  I am um a bit neurotic about food spoilage so his sandwich typically would be - nutella and banana on whole grain bread.  And then some healthy snacks like nuts, fruit, etc.  Anyway he came home and said the other kids said I sent him along with a "mud sandwich".

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On 3/31/2024 at 1:28 PM, Batya33 said:

Edited to add -there is a lovely old novel that was also a movie called I Remember Mama about a struggling family and how she made sure they felt secure.

I watched the old movie (1948) inspired by the novel 2 weeks ago. I really liked it, but most of all, it made me wanting to watch more movies lately.
I had my legs surgery earlier this week and plenty of time lying on my couch... So I decided to watch some of my favorite movies which I didn't do for a long time. I always enjoyed old ones, musicals, love stories etc. Surprisingly, the love stories that I found so beautiful before have lost their magic. The characters are all so complicated. The ones I thought were in love, actually are not. Often it's lust or the fantasy which drives a story which ultimately reaches a dead end. 

People often compare their love stories to those in films and novels, wanting to experience the same feelings. But I have to say that I found nothing transcendent in the ones I watched this week. the most telling example is the Scorcese "The age of innocence". At the end of the movie, the main character decides to walk away from the woman he has been secretly loving for years when he finally had a chance to be with her.  “She didn’t turn around.” At the end that was all that mattered. This whole story is based on desire, there's no deep love. Everything is based only on the stories the main character tells himself, images like all the paintings and the theater present in the film... 

Worst movies of all, Pretty Woman... Is this actually a love story? I only see two incompatible characters getting into a relationship based on nothing but lust and desire. The proposition of Richard Gere to buy her a horse and get her an apartment et.... How can a man who has respect for a woman say that to her. This is so disrespectful and reveling the truth about his intentions towards her. I wonder why this sentence never shocked me before.

I'm becoming so skeptical. I was a lover of love, but I think that I no longer believe in it... not even in movies... 

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1 hour ago, Sindy_0311 said:

 But I have to say that I found nothing transcendent in the ones I watched this week. the most telling example is the Scorcese "The age of innocence". At the end of the movie, the main character decides to walk away from the woman he has been secretly loving for years when he finally had a chance to be with

Have you read the novel, "Th Age of Innocence"?  It's great.  

It's much more a social commentary than a love story and IMO Scorcese nailed it.  

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So I love:  Terms of Endearment (for complicated relationships), Love Story, When Harry Met Sally, Also John Cusack movies including Hi Fidelity (loved the book too -Hornby is a great writer), Also Rear Window again for how relationships are explored.  Also Little Miss Sunshine.  

I too love rewatching movies/rereading books at different stages of my life.  

Hope you're enjoying your weekend and I hope you recover and heal fast!

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On 4/14/2024 at 5:29 AM, Jaunty said:

Have you read the novel, "Th Age of Innocence"?  It's great.  

It's much more a social commentary than a love story and IMO Scorcese nailed it.  

I’ve read many of English novels, Brontes and Austin’s books, also Anna Karenine and others… which are also interesting social commentaries. But I will definitely read the Age of Innocence…

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10 hours ago, Sindy_0311 said:

I’ve read many of English novels, Brontes and Austin’s books, also Anna Karenine and others… which are also interesting social commentaries. But I will definitely read the Age of Innocence…

I would also try Kristin Hannah's books -The Women -her latest one -and The Great Alone.  Also I hope not off topic but check out Alain De Botton book's on love and relationships -not self help -he's a philosopher.

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