can i write to ex apologisng?

[masterman_05]

HI,

 

I was wondering what peoples thoughts were on me sending my ex a letter.

 

we were together 10 months, she broke up with me saying she wasnt ready for serious rship and that. not all truth i know more to it then that, there always is.

 

Its been 3 months. I was ok when we broke up even tho it hurt i didnt want to make it worse between us so i let it go. she calls me every few weeks just to catch up. and i still love her but u knwo she did break up with me so what can i do?

 

the thing is i now realise things i didnt do right when we were together, things like how we spent too much time together ( possibly my fault haha) and how i didnt go out with my friends much, she said she wished i did more ( this wasnt cos i wanted to spend time with her, it was because ive been overseas and im not as close with them anymore, and in all my past rships it has caused major problems between us, when i went out with my mates, also i like just stayin in more now, but i never explained this to her)

 

anyways what i was wondering is this......

 

can i write her a letter sayin sorry for the things i did that contributed to our break up, things like not spending more time away for her to allow us to miss each other, and for not puttin in more effort with her friends etc. she used to exspress these concerns to me but i never fixed em. it was like i didnt listen.

 

or will this just seem like im not movin on?

 

i just wnat her to know i knwo i did things worng too and that im sorry for my bit, n to not feel bad.

 

i just wanted to send a light email sayin ' always meant to tell u i hope u never feel bad or guilty for us breakin up, n im sorry if it seemed i never listened when u told me about htings that bothered u, cos i did , it was me too n im sorry for things i did that contributed in break up like not making more effort to go out with my friends but it was cos i wa shappy just bein on own and they live so far away n were distanced now, plus it caused major probs in my last rships n i was scared it owuld with us, but i should talked to u bout it. so neevr feel bad or anything, i understand everythin. we all learn form these things were we should changed things n so we can necxt time. just know that i know i contributed alot n im sorry for that.

 

what do u think?

 

will she think im just not gettin over it?

[DN]

I think it will seem like an attempt to get her back. I don't think it is a good idea to send it because it won't serve any purpose ans will probably be misinterpreted.

[heloladies21]

You didn't do anything wrong. You were just fine in the relationship. You might have become a little bit needy, but this happens. You should apologize to yourself for any mistakes you made, not her. No letter, no email, no explanation next time she calls. And go into No Contact. You're not getting anything by her calls, it's just preventing you from moving on. Hit on other women. They're waiting for you.

[VultureFury]

Hmm I was thinking of trying something like thay with my 5 month relationship but ive been advised that doing something like that wouldnt work out as you wanted it. It would make you seem needy for her. Since she broke up with you its her choice to come back. Since she still keeps contact with you she probably still has feelings for you but since your still in contact with her, she will never miss you. Since she knows/thinks you still love her she could drag you along as backup just incase her other relationships fail. Since you still love her and are thinking about starting over its best that you start NO CONTACT for at least 3-5 months. If she doesn't take you back around that time, then you mite as well move on and find someone else. It takes 2 for a relationship. If she loves you and notices you've been doing something that bothers her she would bring it up and work things out instead of taking the easy way out.