Why is she doing this to me

[rhino91080]

For 2 years i have been in love with someone but didn't show it very much.We fought all the time,i made empty promises to her i told her we needed to break up many times when we were in the middle of our fights. Finally 2 weeks ago she said it was enough when i said we need to go our separate ways. I've told her i was sorry many of times but it does no good. One day last week we talked and she said there was someone else that she had went out with and had kissed. She had told me is loves me but not in love with me.We used to do everything togetherfor christmas she bought me a dog and she loves the dog more than anything.I had told her many times that i was going to leave her alone. I never did. One day i finally told her i hoped she would be happy in whatever she didand i wasn't going to call her anymore. I didn't a day and a half went by and she called me crying saying she missed the dog. I didn't know what to think about any of it. So last night i call her and she is with the other guy and saying things that hurt me so much thats why i'm at the point of this i don't know what to do or think. Someone else talked to her and she told her that the guy was a one time thing. I don't know how she feels about me and i'm dying inside i have done everything possible to tell her that i will change ever her friends say it looks like i've done some changing but the love of my life doesn't notice itwhat should i do b/c i can't take much more of hurting like this. Will we ever be back together ?

[Turboz]

Well the only thing I can say is that you pushed her too far.

 

You said that you both needed to split time after time and the final time she's done it.

 

You cannot emotionally blackmail someone that you love - It's not fair to them.

 

My best advice now is to forget her and move on with life - Let her live happily.

 

-Turboz

[rhino91080]

but if i want her back and i really made a mistake and i truly love her with all of my heart would there be anything i could do

[Turboz]

Being totally honest I think you've really blown it with her.

 

You've told her you wanted it over so many times she's finally decided that your right.

 

What do you expect her to do? - leave, come back, leave, come back, leave, come back etc?

 

Come on your playing emotional blackmail with her and you know it. Women won't put up with that stuff - they hate it.

 

Would you take you back?

 

-Turboz

[misery12]

I do not agree with you.

I do see hope in this, if she really had no interest, would she take the time to call him, about the dog. Maybe she just wanted to hear his voice.

 

I say you should call her up, and ask her to a friendly breakfast, (supper is too romantic). Inform her it's only as friends, and you just want to start over with her, at any pace she is comfortable with. Tell her you support her every decision, and if you are willing to wait for her to make up her mind, then wait for her, and if she loves you, you will be together again, if she realizes that it just won't work out.. you have to realize reality.

Just, think of it this way.. If you're in this much misery, what do you have to lose by calling her, and getting your feelings out?

I'd do it if I was in your position, if you truly love her.. fight for her.

Hope this helps.

[RainaBabe]

To be honest, I don't think I'd get back together with you again. My boyfriend broke up with me a few times. We're together right now, but I made it perfectly clear to him that this was his last chance, and that it doesn't matter how much we love each other, if he hurts me again by saying it's over, I'm walking away. NO ONE likes to deal with crap like that. It's been about seven months since our last breakup, and I still occasionally have trust issues, and wonder if he's going to break up with me if we have a fight.

 

You need to work on your issues. If she ever does come back to you, THANK HER every damn day. Treat her well, and realize that if you push something away enough, it may never come back.

[DN]

I agree with this position. It is defintely worth a shot. If she tells you it is over for sure then back off, get over her and move on. But I agree that she may be conflicted, so take a chance.

 

If she does decide to reconcile, you have a lot of work to do in communicating properly what you want from each other. Ultimatums and threats rarely succeed, certainly not in the long term, they corrode relationships. Even if this relationship is over, you should learn that for future relationships.

 

Good luck.

[heloladies21]

Back off G. No Contact and stick to it. If she's still interested, she will come back to you.