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My parents were "best friends" with another couple. Long story short, my dad and other couple's wife ended up having an affair, AND having a secret love child, that I just met last year in my fourties!


Who started it? Who knows, who cares at this point. It happened. It put my parents within a hair's breadth of divorce, and had reared it's ugly head many times over the years. Also, even as an 8 year old, I was smart enough to figure out what was going on, and yes, it affected me, in a very negative way.


All I can say is if one of then had grown a conscience and told their spouse right at the beginning that things were heading in an inappropriate way, NONE of that would have happened.


Look, that guy is a predator, period. Doesn't matter if he's a drunk predator or not. He's a predator, and you are weak to him. This is NOT a good combination.


You expected the advice that you should cut these people out of your lives? Well, that's because you SHOULD. It's self evident. That's why you predicted it before you even came here. Otherwise you're playing with fire. You don't need to tell your husband, but it will make it a whole lot easier to cut ties with them if you do. You haven't done anything so wrong.... yet. Your husband should forgive you as it is mostly on this other guy.


Should you go to a counselor to figure out why you were weak to this guy? Absolutely. But that's step number TWO. Step one is cut these people out of your lives. Once this kind of crap happens, it's never going to be the same. If you don't do it, I don't want to see you coming back a few months from now to cry about you succumbed to this guy and slept with him.

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The predatory stare is often associated with sociopaths. Flirting with you is part of his abuse campaign against her. And about his ego/prowess. It's not about you at all

her man has anger issues, he has never hit her but can fly off the handle at small things and it has scared her a few occasions.
Read up on it: Mask Of Sanity


"Women, in particular, have reported this stare, which is related to the "predatorial" (reptilian) gaze; it is as if the psychopath is directing all of his intensity toward you through his eyes, a sensation that one woman reported as a feeling of "being eaten." They tend to invade peoples' space either by their sudden intrusions or intimidating look-overs (which some women confuse for sexuality.)

The Psychopaths stare is very effective during the luring and "honeymoon" phases. Women often mistake it as "being sexy" and for "Sexual Attraction" eye gazing occurs in copious amounts during the "Luring and honeymoon stage" at the beginning of the relationship."

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