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What is this guy playing at?


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So, around Christmas I was speaking to this guy; I’ve known him for years and we’ve always been friends... we went for a meal which was nice and we got along well, and then the day after that I saw him again and we went to his and watched a film.


After this, we were still speaking but he didn’t ask to see me. I asked him but he said he wanted to wait until he felt better because he was ill... it had then been 2 weeks since we last saw eachother and I said how “I think we should stop whatever’s going on as it doesn’t feel like it’s going anywhere”, he said “we should have a few days space and see how we feel then because I’m not sure at the moment”. Obviously, he wasn’t ill he just didn’t want to see me again. I said “let’s just leave things now, there’s no point in forcing it” and he said “okay”.


After this, we stopped speaking completely. However, last weekend I was out and he was out as well... I was pretty drunk and so was he, I ended up going back to his and we slept together (bad I know but it happened). In the morning, things weren’t awkward at all, we get along well, I kind of like him which is why I’m asking about it in this forum.


The following day, I said it was nice seeing him and he agreed... he then messaged me the next day randomly, calling me “babe” which gives me the impression he’s interested. I told him to message me tomorrow if he wants, it’s been 2 days and he hasn’t.


What is he playing at? I understand if he’s not interested but why would he message me like that? Plus, he’s the one who liked me initially at the beginning. I’m kind of into him since it does feel nice when we’re together, I just want to know why he’s being like this... a guy’s perspective would be useful.


P.S, it’s not like I’ve been clingy towards him either. I’ve been really laid back and friendly towards him except when it had been 2 weeks and I could tell he had no intention of seeing me which made me cut things off because he clearly wasn't interested.

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he then messaged me the next day randomly, calling me “babe” which gives me the impression he’s interested.


That gives me the impression that he's a player.


You're misreading the cues, OP. He's a smooth-talker, that's all. "Babe" from a guy you hardly know, who faded before, randomly pops up and sleeps with you isn't a sign of interest. It's a sign he knows how to talk to girls to get what he wants (ie. sex) I would not count on this becoming something more than casual sex.

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Hmm it’s not really FWB though because it was random, we hadn’t been speaking or seeing eachother when it happened. I agree maybe he sees me too much as a friend since I knew him throughout college etc, that’s probably why we get on so well

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Thank you for the helpful advice MissCanuck! We weren’t talking to eachother when us sleeping together happened though, we stopped speaking at the start of January. We were both drunk and I was even the one who inititiated it, you’re probably right about the player bit though. It sounds like he likes knowing he has me there if he wants me

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That’s true, I didn’t think of it like that! The thing is though, if that is the case, he hasn’t really spoken to me since anyway... I’m out with some friends this weekend including him and he knows that so maybe he’s waiting until the weekend and hoping it will happen again

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