My depressed ex cut me off from his life

[sreyoun]

Hello all that is reading,

I have been so distraught over the last month or so because my long term boyfriend of three years has broken up with me. We got into a fight earlier that was about jealousy and insecurity. He had been taking anti-depressants a bit before we broke up, and then I believe he is continuing it. We are also in a long distance relationship. He used to be so caring, loving, passionate, kind everything I any girl could ever ask for. And in person, the feelings and his true self amplified it leaving me head over heels for him.

Anyways, the first few weeks of our breakup was that he said he still loves me, but I had to change, and I agreed. I didn't want to be a negative person anymore. And believe it or not, I did change because it was the slap in the face of reality that I would be losing him.. He said he saw the change in me after the two weeks. I kept reminding him of the feelings we had for each other, especially in person and that there's a reason why we keep fighting for this. He was agreeing before, and then now things quickly turned sour. He blamed everything on me, he regrets me, resents me, doesn't want to see me and he just simply doesn't care.. Then now just as quick, he just cut me out of his life. And like I can't just go see him, and I am unsure of what to do. I love him unconditionally, even after all of the cruel things he has said to me. I still love him and want to be with him eventually. Is there anything I can do? I understand that he's going through some things, and it's painful to be on the receiving end of all this backlash. All I could tell him was that I care and I'll always be there. Do you think that we will find a way back to each other? Thank you for all that read I am sorry it's long. I just had a lot to say.

[MeiLa]

I would go full NC. If he really loves you. He will contact you. Don’t wait on him. Live your life.

[DanZee]

This is a double whammy. You got involved in an online romance and you got involved with a depressed person. So in an online romance, it's easy to say a lot of lovey-dovey stuff, but is he really saying it to you or to a fantasy girl in his mind? And with a person suffering with depression, they routinely lash out at the people in their lives exactly as he lashed out at you.

 

If you guys were actually dating in person, there would be things you could do to cheer him up, like taking him to movies, concerts and events, and helping him get counselling and staying on his meds. But you've got drawn into an impossible situation. If you read through a lot of the postings here you will read stories almost exactly like the one you've written here.

 

The best thing to do is forget about him and find someone who lives in your area to go out on real dates, to hold their hand, and to kiss and cuddle with. Don't get involved with people suffering from depression. It only causes a lot of heartache.