for the guys...how should we approach you?HELP!

[shellie12345]

Ok guys,

I have the hardest time approaching men that I am attracted to. I think it is self-esteem. I don't have extremely low self esteem but whenever I try to approach someone I just clam up and freeze. I am normally a very outgoing girl and I love good conversation, but I go blank right away! I feel so silly afterwards because i know that i could have said or done a million things to show my true personality. My question for all of you is, if a girl who approaches you kinda shys away and runs out of things to say, is it a huge turn-off? Or can you tell she is just being shy and understand? Also, what turns you all on when a girl comes up to you? Do you like a funny comment?for her to buy you a drink? Or do you just like her to come and introduce herself to you?

Help is needed here!!!

thanks

[Sn0man]

Applause!! A girl who isn't afraid to approach the men!! I salute you!

 

If you can start the conversation, you are allowed to shy out because the guy should be confident enough after being approached by you to carry it on. If he can't, then he's probably far too shy for you.

 

A funny comment or witty remark is always a big convo-starter, as long as it's not sarcasm or rude humor, which will make the most confident man shy away most of the time.

[greenie35]

If you can start the conversation, you are allowed to shy out because the guy should be confident enough after being approached by you to carry it on. If he can't, then he's probably far too shy for you.

 

 

THat's good to know.

[Mr. B]

As a kinda-shy person myself, I'm well aware of the courage it takes anyone (male or female) to approach a stranger and attempt to start a conversation. With that understood, it certainly wouldn't be a turn-off for me.

 

As for myself, having a girl voluntarily approach me at all is quite nice. Ofcourse simple things like eye contact and reasonable posture certainly help. Beyond that, just be yourself. If whoever you're speaking with doesn't like you as you are, you're just wasting your time anyway.

[Sn0man]

I didn't say it was a turn off...

 

?

[ShySoul]

Well, considering no girl has ever approached me I think it would be pretty flattering if that happened at all. Honestly, I wouldn't care how she was or what she did so long as it felt like she was being herself. If we she was nice and we had something in common I would talk to her. But if she is pushy, loud, rude, or fake then I'm not interested. In my opinion, shy is very attractive, and plenty of guys agree.

[mwint21]

I reckon that if a girl is stuttering or being shy, its a sign that she likes you. i would take that as a hint

[Day_Walker]

Good conversation is important. Being funny is always a plus but the main idea is to get your point accross. You should do what you are comfortable with.

[Unmotivated]

My question for all of you is, if a girl who approaches you kinda shys away and runs out of things to say, is it a huge turn-off?

 

Actually, it's more of a turn-on for me. I have similar problems approaching girls, and thereforeeee I would feel like we had something in common.

[shellie12345]

well i must say, i was very surpised by some of the comments you all gave me...pleasantly surprised though

See the thing is, if guys like it when girls are a little shy then I must be approaching all the wrong guys. When I do approach (which is not all the time) I usually end up feeling like an idiot because the guy simply shows no interest in continuing the conversation, or I say a stupid line or joke (like I always do) and feel too embarrassed to keep talking! My girlfriends often tease me because of that, when I get nevous I say the stupidest things as a feeble attempt at being funny....it happens far too often!

Anyway, thanks for the encouragement guys. I guess I should just keep my fingers crossed that one day one of my silly comments will spark something with the "right" guy, for now I can just be me!

One more thing....no one really answered this one, do you guys like it when we buy you a drink?? Seems like a silly question but I always wondered.

thanks again

shellie

[Sn0man]

Yep, we like that too...I mean, we buy girls drinks quite often, and most of the time we feel like fools afterwards because we then find out they were only using us for a free drink...so when the woman offers to buy us a drink that's a real bonus!

[Santa]

Wow, I just had a wake up call... I didn't realise girls buying you a drink was like a way of approaching you - that just totally didn't register in my mind!

I hate it when girls approach me, and are over confidant. It's normally chavs, or atleast my initial inpression of them is that they are. For me, a girl that does that in my mind doesn't really 'value' dating as such (for me its kind of magical - ie there should be a click).

If a girl was to get me interest when she approached, I think I would like her to appear shy, as that would give me an amazing ego boost, and i would think "wow shes got the guts too approach me, especially since shes shy", if i got the hint that is (which is likely if i never talk to this person).

I think if a girl melts my heart by being cute (perhaps by looking pathetic), then I should like her alot.