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If this girl is into me, what can I do about it in my circumstance?


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Hey everyone. I joined a band recently, and there's a girl in it. I've met with the band maybe five times, and four out of the five this girl has complimented me, about my hair, about my clothes etc, and I don't notice her saying this to other people. Usually, this means to me, that if a girl goes out of her way to compliment you she is interested, but the problem is that she has a boyfriend, so either I'm a crazy fool or she is. What is strange is that the other night, she got me to do up the back of her dress, while her boyfriend was nearby. When we drove back, she was right up against me, and she put her head on my shoulder for a bit, and then it was like she realized what she was doing and restrained. I'm not sure what other clues I can give, but she does seem to go near me, or sit next to me, and when I said I might be travelling later this summer, I thought I noticed she seemed upset. I notice that she doesn't necessarily get along with her boyfriend, and she rephrased talking about him as her boyfriend as I mean, 'him' etc.. so it seems to me that things might not be going as planned, or he isn't what she bargained for, but then again, these are just hunches..


I'm not very good at signs, and pretty pathetic at flirtation, but she said I am a good listener, so I do feel as though I am connecting. My last girlfriend was a year and a half ago, and I haven't had sex in a long time, and here is a girl that I have so much in common with and am attracted to.. but of course there's the problem that a) I may be misinterpreting someone who is just being friendly. b) She's still, as far as I can tell, in a relationship. c) If I show too much interest or make an advance, I have the potential of creeping someone out who wanted to just be friends and potentially ending the band. Any advice here? I know that some people might say this is immoral, but if her relationship isn't working, it's not. In any case, what can I do from this point forward? Is there anything I can say and do that would confirm 100% that she's into or not into me, so I can at-least figure this out?


Thanks for reading.

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You are getting a sneak preview of how this girl behaves in a relationship......and you are considering putting yourself in the same place as her boyfriend is now...are you mad? Don't for one second believe that you could never be in his position. Would you want your girlfriend behaving the way she is to you, with some other guy...I doubt it.


It doesn't take Sherlock Holmes to figure out she is not good relationship material.

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That's true, although, do we really know the background here or what's really going on, what if things are going very badly? Okay, so just to clarify, this is not typically something girls do? Again, could it be that's she's just being friendly, or that she lacks the social skills that most girls have? I didn't think so, as these seem to be tell-tale signs of interest, but I've been wrong before..

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It doesn't matter what the background is....if things aren't going great with her boyfriend she should either work on it to try and resolve it, or end it....not line up a replacement boyfriend first.


People see what they want to see. Yes those things are signs of interest on her behalf, you're obviously flattered by the attention....but don't be blinded by it.

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