Should I try to get my ex back ?

[jay228]

Hey, just broke up with my gf of 2 months a few days ago. We are both 17, kinda long distance. We don't see each other everyday just few times in a few months. We been to a few dates and hang out a couple times when we were friends. We both would sit for a national test this year therefore both of us are busy and this is pretty much why we broke up. In this relationship, I'm the clingy boyfriend shes the independent girlfriend. I didn't constantly ask for her attention or kept calling her or anything like that but according to her i'm clingy...so yea. I mean we barely get to talk, and she is way busier than me, so i wait for her to text me most the time instead of texting her and when she does I would try to talk to her as much as I could. It wasn't like this at first, she would be talking to me quite often and tell me all the fun we could have after this national test which ends this November. She is really really into her studies and dreams therefore she would prioritize her studies and I totally get that. We pretty much doesn't have a quality conversation just checking up messages those past 2 weeks before we broke up. That's why I kept trying to bring back those earlier times when we are both happy. Tbh sometimes her actions and the things she said really shows that she likes me enough to be my gf but doesn't love me. Me on the other hand, I really love her with all my heart. Now, I'm pretty much blaming myself for this breakup because I was acting all insecure, overthinking and stuff. But I thought, if she didn't say those things like 'I don't really see you in my future' I would feel secure right ??? She really cared about my studies too. I was kinda mentioning she doesn't put enough effort in our relationship anymore because she would call or send me cute message when I got home from school. Now I would be lucky to talk to her for 10 minutes at night. We were fighting for few days. I sent her a long text saying it's okay, we can take this one step at a time but there really should be changes and I suggest if this is all too much maybe we should break up. She broke up with me stating that she doesn't have enough time to be in a relationship and sometimes when I need her attention, she cant give it to me. We agreed to stayed friends, but she hasn't talked to me yet.

 

She's actually my first love and honesty I don't blame her for not loving me as much as I did. I mean we only been together for 2 months and it's pretty stupid for me to expect her to say something like 'I see you in my future'. I think we just don't have enough time to actually have a stronger bond and for her to actually fall in love. I was thinking if I should try to get back with her after the national test when we have more time. I can't even imagine her being with someone else. Can I masturbate to her or should I just stop?...What is your opinion ? Thank You.

[MissCanuck]

I hate to say it, but I would just let her go. She is right that she doesn't have time and her interest level just doesn't sound high enough to keep this going, especially if it's long-distance.

 

I think you will be much happier to find a local girl who can regularly go on dates with you and give you more time.

 

As for what you do in your "self-love" time...well, that's kind of irrelevant, but you might want to try to think of other things than her to get your fire going.

[mintcupcake]

"... We are both 17, kinda long distance. We don't see each other everyday just few times in a few months ... We both would sit for a national test this year and this is pretty much why we broke up ... according to her i'm clingy...I mean we barely get to talk ... It wasn't like this at first, she would be talking to me quite often ... We pretty much doesn't have a quality conversation just checking up messages those past 2 weeks before we broke up ... Tbh sometimes her actions and the things she said really shows that she likes me enough to be my gf but doesn't love me ... if she didn't say those things like 'I don't really see you in my future' I would feel secure right ??? ... Now I would be lucky to talk to her for 10 minutes at night. We were fighting for few days ... She broke up with me stating that she doesn't have enough time to be in a relationship ... she hasn't talked to me yet.

 

... I mean we only been together for 2 months and it's pretty stupid for me to expect her to say something like 'I see you in my future'. I think we just don't have enough time to actually have a stronger bond and for her to actually fall in love. I was thinking if I should try to get back with her after the national test when we have more time. I can't even imagine her being with someone else. Can I masturbate to her or should I just stop?...What is your opinion ? Thank You."

 

Being honest.. you're 17, you're long distance, you've been fighting all of the time (so a lot of stress considering both of your studies should be the most important thing here), she broke up with you, she thinks you're clingy and you were together for 2 months. Is it worth it?

 

I'm not ruling out that she might realise she's made a bit of an error and cut you off in haste - but you shouldn't be waiting around for it. It might never happen. She might meet someone else. You might meet someone else. Throw yourself into your schooling, explore your options and see what happens. Don't chase after her, she already thinks you're clingy and she chose to break up with you.