Not sure what to think anymore..

[michou]

My ex and i broke up about a week ago...he dumped me because he said he was tired of fighting..i started most of the fights..i was too clingy and was getting jealous..and i noticed i was...i told him that ..he still wanted to break up saying that its gonna happen all over again..i said no..i know it won't...he also said that he wanted no strings attached..that he had to be single..i personally think that he hasn't gotten over his dad's death.we started goin out two weeks after his dad's death.i don't know if that had somethin to do with it.we dated for five months..we did it..i know him better than anyone yet i can't tell if he still wants to get back together..he told he still had strong feelings for me..i still love him.he's my rock..he keeps me from going crazy and being stressed out...i know it sounds stupid considerin i'm only 16..but we were so in love and didn't care what other ppl thought of the seriousiness of the relationship....i don't know if that scared him off or not..we both have feeling for eachother..its so weird..we decided to be friends.and thats hard..he's my best guy friend...i want him back so bad.we see eachother at school..we still catch eachother starring at one and other..i haven't been sleeping all that well..and eatin well...i really don't have an appetite...i really really love this guy...how do i get him back..how do i get him to miss me or do i give him his space and move on.[/b]

[Mun]

Hi there,

I think you should back off and leave him alone. He wants/needs to get away from a very hurtful situation (all the fighting) and you should respect that. Since you are broken up you really have no choice but to move on. I know that hurts you, but if you back off and move on...and he still loves you--he will see the changes and might react and come looking for you... but if you continue to be clingy and a bit desperate then he will only feel justified in his decision to leave you.

 

Make these changes for yourself though. He may or may not come back, but you want to have more successful relationships in the future.

 

Remember that each person needs their own personal space--along with their couple time, so always maintain your independence and your own life ( hobies, interests, friends) so that you don't need him to be with you ALL the time...because you have your own things going on too. Make sense?

[michou]

thanx muneca,

 

I understand, its so hard, my friends have been ignoring me, and some of my other friends are totally hanging out with him..we share the same friends..its so hard not to be around him...how do i look independent and okay on my own when we hang around with the same friends?

[twelve]

have you tried talking to your friends?

try approaching them and saying "hey looks guys you're making me feel pretty awful by ignoring me - is there something i have done - i wudnt want to do anything to hurt/upset you guys, could you please explain so i can put right what i have done.."

you may want to ask them if this split/fight with your boyf/ex has caused them to ignore you, and has he said anything about you and IF he has

uou would appreciate if they didnt take sides, or at least hear your side.

 

Maybe you are closer to one whom you can write a letter too?

if they are still immature after this, well they are not the friends you thought they were.

 

Reminds me a lot of my highschool days (which were not fun).

Girls can be so catty as teenagers for no particular reason.

just hear it from me, you will have better friends in the future.

Are there any places you can meet new people? Clubs at school etc?

 

As for the guy, as hard as it is, DO NOT push him, give him space.

That is what he needs and as much as it hurts and sux, if you don't give him this, things will get worse.

You can make things better by backing off.

Try and meet new people.

You will make yourself stronger and he'll see that, and he will probably miss you. WOuld be odd if he didn't, and if he didn't, you are not meant to be.

It happened to me when I backed off.

The ex needed to text me to "send me some photos"....

*then we fought again - good one*

Keep us posted xoxox

[michou]

thanx...sorry for bugging u guys again..but what does it mean..when he keeps looking at me during breaks and lunch ..and pretty much any other (weekends ..socials..stuff like that) maybe its just me but he seems to be trying to get me mad ...he use to hate wearing hoodies when we were datin..i think there hot...he never wore them..now he's wearin them...just stuff like that..does he need time to figure things out...cuz he's gonna be goin off to universtity..we had made plans about how things were going to go....when we were gonna see eachother...considerin i'm only graduating the year after. i don't know what to think..or if i'm seeing things