Ignored by a "Fake" Friend

[uilanihi808]

This girl I thought was my best friend, constantly ignores me and people tell me that she calls me her "fake friend."

 

My freshman year of high school, me and this girl was not very close... at all. I would talk to my friends about her because she'd always jump from one friend to another.

 

My Sophmore year and my best friend moved to Texas. I'd just hang out with my old friends. I surf a lot, so she asked me if I wanted to go beach with her. I said sure, it was kind of awkward, but I just tried to be myself and make her laugh. So we went out multiple times. Whenever we'd be at school, her best friend and her would always be together. I was so convinced that I could just let it slide and have fun with them.

 

We'd go to the beach every weekend! I would provide rides for her. I can't drive, so my parents would need to take us. She would only take me once in a while. Soon, she would bring in a different personality, the personality I'd see in our Freshman year. She started asking me to take her more. She'd call me her best friend. Whenever we'd be at school she'd go straight to the other girl and PUSH ME AWAY! I'd get mad and she'd ask me why I am ignoring her.

 

I'D GET SO PISSED. And I she gets so obnoxious every time in near her. I feel like she is trying to make me jealous because she's hanging out with her friend instead of me. She'd always call her name out loud for the whole class to hear, she'd always take pictures with her and put a caption saying how they're so close.

 

***Onetime, I sat with both of them during lunch, my friend turned her back towards be and talked to her friend the whole time while I would have to look like a third wheel sitting with them.***

 

Now she pushed me away, she hardly has friends because her friend has a boyfriend. I done feel bad, but I wish I could argue and scream at her whenever I want. HOW CAN I FIX MY FEELINGS & do you think what she's doing is wrong or it's just me?

[Hollyj]

I'm curious why you call her you best friend?

 

I'm sorry, but she does not sound nice, or value you, at all. In fact, I think, she simply uses you.

 

i suggest you distance yourself, and find some real friends.

 

Time to instill some boundaries in your life. Learn young. You know that she is not your friend, follow your intuition.

[Lisii]

Friends are meant to support and uplift you and vice-versa.

 

I second Holly's response. This "friend" of yours doesn't sound like a nice person, or someone who values and respects people, her behaviour is very immature and nasty. from my experience people like her will suck your self esteem and hang you to dry. Don't give her that power, walk away.

[catfeeder]

At lunch I would have asked before too long, "Hey, what's with giving me the back, there, sister?" If her response was hostile, I'd have told her she can let me know if she'd ever like to 'play nice' again as I moved somewhere else, and that's the last she'd see of me beyond a passing hello if our paths cross in public.

 

It makes no sense to pretzel yourself around someone else's mistreatment. She can play stupid about her own cruelty, but that's not your problem. Move on to make friends with someone who appears more lonely than you, even if they're younger, older or you meet them in an activity outside of school. Leave the people who aren't open to an equal friendship behind, and don't knock yourself out for anyone's approval or acceptance.

 

You might also find it helpful to make friends with people who are older, even adults, outside of school. Sign up for a group that interests you, show up alone, and either introduce yourself or ask the leader to introduce you to some of the people attending. If you can bond with adults during this time, they can mentor you and help you navigate social situations in school. Seeing a school counselor can also help, but you need to be willing to ask for the help.

 

Head high.