Am I just not attracted to him?

[BlueEternity]

Okay, so I'm a very introverted and rather geeky young woman currently trying to navigate my first real relationship (most of my previous dating experiences began online and fizzled after a few dates). We've been awkwardly transitioning out of the friend zone for months, but only officially dating three weeks. Well, for the first time, we held hands while walking. (The first time I had held hands with a guy for romantic purposes)

 

The very first instant, I felt a sort of thrill like "he's holding my hand! This is really happening!" but then very it quickly just felt awkward and clumsy, my hands felt sweaty and my fingers felt cold, and I kept wondering when it would be not-awkward for me to take my hand back. (When he let go of my hand to push a traffic button a few minutes later, I tucked my hand into my pocket, and he did not try to hold it again, although the date continued for another hour or two afterwards).

 

Is this is a huge red flag that I am not attracted to him, or is this normal, and I only thought hand holding was going to be special and awesome because I've been overly influenced by movies/romance novels/etc and have no real world experience with relationships?

 

I've always thought he was cute from the moment I met him, and have experienced isolated moments of intense, if somewhat abstract, attraction to him, but mostly I am interested in his personality. We get along really well and have a lot in common. He is a really kind and good guy, and I couldn't ask to be treated better, but I am seriously concerned. I've kiboshed potential relationships before on lack of attraction, but I don't want to give up on this one...

[rayfutz]

So you got flustered. Are you really attracted to him physically? What is it about his personality that draws you in? I would not worry about digging into your subconsciousness so deep just yet, you just met him. Why don't you just relax and watch the way you two get to know each other and how he treats you.

[Wiseman2]

Completely normal. It's all new and remember he's feeling nervous and awkward too.

I felt a sort of thrill like "he's holding my hand! This is really happening!" but then very it quickly just felt awkward and clumsy, my hands felt sweaty and my fingers felt cold, and I kept wondering when it would be not-awkward for me to take my hand back.