I wanted him back...But what was I thinking?

[dustinthewind]

Hey guys....A few of you might remember me and my story. My bf just broke up with me a few days ago, because we kept having stupid petty fights about nothing. Basically not appreciating each other. It all added up and he ended it saying he wasn't happy anymore. Which sucks, cause in all honesty we were perfect for each other in so many ways.

 

I posted here asking how to get him back, being all heart broken and sad. I started to do this No contact thing like people suggested (its day number 4)

 

But last nite I learned that the entire time we were dating he was chatting up random girls on the internet, saying completely innappropriate sexual things to them, and in some cases going on webcam or getting them to send him gross pictures....sometimes people would call him when I was around and he never anwsered...it was THESE STUPID GIRLS!!!!

ON TOP OF THIS....(as if this isn't enough).....

 

It's been 4 days after we ended it, and guess who is a member of this internet sexual dating site...looking for cybersex, kinky emails, and discrete incounters....what an A**! I mean what happened to greiving about our lost relationship. Even though he was the one the end it..

 

All of this just makes me feel so sick inside. I have this urge to just vomit thinking about this. I cared about him so incredibly much, and trusted him, and opened up, and really truly thought that we were meant to be together forever. Now I realize what a scum bag he really is. I feel hurt and decieved. And I think knowing this makes me hurt even more. I sorta wish I was still living in this bubble where I thought he was perfect, and I had made a mistake, learnt from it, and we could work things out, I wanted to get back together.....

 

Honestly right now I know the best thing for me is to have nothing to do with liars and scum bags like him...its going to be so hard though. Cause you know how when you love someone you overlook their flaws..Im going to need your guys's help and support to make sure I dont overlook this in times of weakness. He doesn't deserve me.

[ocean9]

It is a good thing that you found this information out now, rather than later!

He sounds like someone you should stay far away from!

[Scout]

Some advice: next time you're in a relationship, pay attention to the warning signs, the red flags. People who are scum bags generally show it pretty early on in some way - do not ignore those signs if they appear with someone else. Trust your instincts.

 

And yeah, don't have anything else to do with this perv.

[Fif Angel]

oh, God I`m sorry to hear that dustinthewind. At least you finally know what a *beep* he is. It must be so hard, thinking you know someone so well...

 

You are so right that he doesn`t deserve you. Hopefully realising what a loser he is will help speed up he process of getting over him somewhat.

 

We`re all here for you sweetheart (((hugs))) Take care

[RayKay]

Well it is good reason to move on then! Though hurtful, it is better being able to move on knowing you are lucky not to be with him.

 

And I second Scout, pay attention to early warning signs like the ones you saw (him not answering calls frequently, etc). Don't purposely LOOK for them, as that can cause tension and you to suspect things that are not happening, but if something seems off, and your gut is telling you it is, it is wise to investigate more into it.

 

Good luck in the future - there are much greater, upstanding, honest, loving men out there!

[lady00]

I agree with the others...now that you know that he's shady, you can start getting over him even faster. You are right, he doesn't deserve you. If he was doing all that while you were together, I think most people would consider it cheating so really the breakup a win-win situation (right now it hurts but eventually you will not only understand that in your head as you do now but also in your heart) , you're free from him and he's free to have all the cyber-fun he wants...let him be some one else's problem and be glad that he's no longer yours. I'm sorry you had to go through that...but as far as your interactions with him are concerned, the worst is over...now comes he beneficial part...healing and moving on. Good luck.