A NC question

[detox5]

Ok ive been going NC, this is my 4th week i think, we mostly talk online, when shes at work during the day, cause i was out of work.

 

Anyways, i went NC, cause i was real needy around her, without me even realising it, plus I was around f ar too much, and i was starting to think she was taking it for granted.

 

Anyways, i got a new job and i start monday, I was thinkin, should i send her an email and tell her i got a new and that i wont be able to talk to her during the day anymore, we would sometimes talk in the evenings.

 

I came online twice this week, first time in 4 weeks, she said hi to me, i ignore it and went offline 20 mins later.

 

Just wondering if im doing the right thing, and should i tell her i have a new job?

[Bibora]

I don't think that's NC you doing. More of not seeing... But still in touch with each other.

 

Well, won't she think it's odd that suddenly you stop talking to her? Or both of you agreed in NC? I guess it won't hurt much saying to her you have a new job and you won't be able to talk to her much often. Probably she will be happy for you.

 

I for once, if it's NC, it's NC for everything.

[vhshowdown]

I agree with Bibora. NC really means NC what so ever!! So that way you can figure out what you want, miss each other, etc... but still communicating online is contact....

 

i would tell her you have a new job, but maybe not mention that you wont be able to talk online. She will prolly start missing you then, and maybe realize what it is she is missing!! This will take care of your true NC for awhile I would think...

[littlelaxer]

in my opinion i dont think u are doing no contact either. No contact to me is avoiding them at all costs. Yea so she IMs u online, she might just be being nice.

 

Also i dont think u should email her about ur job. Maybe if she calls u one day u can tell her about ur new job. I think u emailing her is almost just an excuse to contact her. Maybe if u go into the no contact she will call cause she will wonder what is up with u, and then u can say "well things are going great i got a new job...blah blah."

[detox5]

Well i think you are all right, i have failed with NC, i thought NC just meant YOU not iniating (spelling) contact, but me goign online so she can see me etc, maybe its just me playing games for her to contact me etc.

 

and your right again, NC means NC at all costs, even avoiding them, so that means no more going online and checking up on her right?

 

I want to do alot more for myself, get a little more achieved so i can show ive been real busy and am doign well, without her need in my life, get what i mean?

 

But yes i should avoid her at all costs, what was i thinking?