billybob111 Posted February 26, 2005 Share Posted February 26, 2005 My ex started seeing someone as soon as she went back to college. We were together for four years, and I still think about her every day. My ex and I had a rocky relationship, we bickered a lot, but I knew we adored each other. I haven't seen my ex since last september, it is now the end of february. I have moved on with another girl (girls really), however I still think about her all the time. Is this normal? I was her first sexual encounter and it really hurts me to think that she's doing this with someone else, even though I am with other girls also. She has contacted me many times over the internet, just for small talk, which really drives me insane also. I know if/ when I see her again im going to hurt. I'm currently in school so I'm busy all of the time, but any advice would be terrific. Even though my current gf is freaking smokin', I still cant get over my ex. Thoughts? william robert Link to comment
DN Posted February 26, 2005 Share Posted February 26, 2005 well this is easy to say and somewhat obvious but you have to dscipline your mind to concentrate on your current gf and forget about ex. So stop any contact with her at all. The every time you think of the ex say this to yourself: "my current gf is freaking smokin'" and think of the new gf instead. Doing it is the hard part but the more you do the easier it will become. Link to comment
billybob111 Posted February 26, 2005 Author Share Posted February 26, 2005 you're right, of course. every time she contacts me, my heart beats a million times a minute and i get all out of breath. its really weak and i hate myself for it. she's young and having fun in undergrad, and it's really pathetic that i even feel this way. i have never contacted her, always let her contact me. i feel as though if i block her from contacting me ill never see her again though. should i just block her?? william Link to comment
DN Posted February 26, 2005 Share Posted February 26, 2005 yes, sounds harsh but it is in your own best interests. You are essentially addicted to her and need to quit the habit. Link to comment
billybob111 Posted February 27, 2005 Author Share Posted February 27, 2005 the reality of the situation is that my current gf is much hotter/nicer than my last. my last one was emotionally abusive (im not a pansy, im just telling it like it is) and fickle. i guess you're right, im just addictive to my ex, i mean she was my first long term gf. maybe it's for the best. william Link to comment
DN Posted February 27, 2005 Share Posted February 27, 2005 Not maybe --- is. Good luck. Link to comment
billybob111 Posted April 9, 2005 Author Share Posted April 9, 2005 just an update..... my ex contacted me aftesr 8 month and said she really wanted to see me. she came over, we were intimate, and she stayed with me for the weekend. the next weekend was the same, she stayed with me all weekend, and things were great. now she went back home (around 3 hours away) and is busy partying with her friends and other guys. i try to stay upbeat when im on the phone with her but i cant help but have a sinking feeling in my heart when i talk to her. it makes me feel terrible. what is she doing? what is wrong with me? any help would be great. william Link to comment
coolcol Posted April 9, 2005 Share Posted April 9, 2005 Whatever her reasons for wanting to see you after 8 mths were, its not doing you any good allowing yourself to be mentally tortured and 'used' in such a way. You have to either ASK! her why she wanted to see you and what does she hope to acheieve, does she still have any feelings for you etc or else let her go and move on 4GOOD! This cycle will never be broken while you continue to allow her to come and go in your life when she pleases...god knows whats she doing....ask her why after 8 mths she wanted to come over to get intimate! From what you said she went back home and is busy partying with friends and guys! do yourself a big favour and LET HER GO!........you will only live your life in limbo, constantly thinking about her..... I have an ex who sounds the same and she used to call all the shots, seeing me for sex and only replying to m txts when it suited her.....i lost all control, became obssessed over her etc.....its the quickest way to live your life in hell and go quietly insane!. And if you still have that wonderful girlfriend of yours ("my current gf is freaking smokin'") its not exactly fair to her is it? Just wipe her from your mind.....next time she rings you up to come over tell her you are busy!.......or you will live your life around her and never move on. So the solution is simple....move on! 4get her.....fine if you want to chat as friends (BUT best if you DONT! after all you will only get upset at what shes doing), but make it clear you have a new girl and are happy. MAHATMA GANDHI once said......''How can a 'sore' heal itself if you keep picking at it!?'' You have to do this for your own sanity my friend! .........move on... Link to comment
billybob111 Posted April 16, 2005 Author Share Posted April 16, 2005 thanks for the reply and advice, they are both appreciated! william Link to comment
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