Should I make contact? ex GF of 3 years

[Giantxander]

Me and my exgirlfriend of 3 years broke up on the 31st Jan. Since then I made the mistake of telling her I could change what she didn't like ect and she said she didn't want to give it another chance. Before that we had a really happy and healthy relationship, we spent pretty much everyday together, were madly in love, had plans together, went to uni together ect. Before we broke up we had just been away together and she had just booked for us to go away in the summer as a Christmas present, which makes me think it was a spontaneous situation. Before we broke up we had both come to the idea of moving out due to my stressful family life at home and both of us wanted to. We had looked at houses and she had even set up a credit card and a savers account, everything was fine. Then there was a two week patch where suddenly because of her parents she didn't want to move out and that I couldn't take my dog. Automatically I was disappointed and was dead set against the idea of not taking the dog and having to wait years to move out when it was okay to a few weeks ago. I haven't contacted her in 23 days, which is close to 30. I have had time to reflect and have come to the decision alone that it wouldn't be right to take the dog and to wait to move out, but that is something which I needed to think for myself instead of being forced into it. over those two weeks I suppose we were quite distant from each other and in our own way that was most likely an argument in its self. I know what it will take to make it work now, but I know it takes both parties to make the effort. I have just had the good news of getting a new jobs which I would like to share.And I have just had the bad news that her family is decideing to move, not too far, but she will be half an hour away from her horses which I know she wont be happy about at the moment. I may be wrong but knowing her, I'm sure she is probably stressing and finding it hard at the moment with the idea of moving as I know she didn't want to. Should I use this to make contact? Just a casual drop in text, like have you heard about .....? Just thought you might want to know. Or should I just leave it and if she wants to talk she will reach out. But I know she is stubborn and proud. At the same time I suppose I could be hoping this, but I'm sure she must be regretting the option of not miving out with me and having her own place, because it has backfired on her as she is still having to move when she didn't want to in the first place.

[Giantxander]

just to add to this, her family have stayed friends with mine over face book and her family, mum in particular, likes or comments on pretty much everything my family posts on facebook, which is slightly annoying. My ex has also kept the tickets for the holiday she had booked for me as a Christmas present.

[jennylove]

Keep the dog!! You are a package deal! Trust me, You will hate yourself if you dump him when you had the choice to keep him. Karma will catch up with you there, just saying. Forget the ex, she dumped your ass. Was she thinking about you and how you'd feel being dumped. Nope. I don't care how stressful the situation at home, if you love someone you don't dump them. Start the new job and tske your dog (chick magnet) to the park everyday to clear your head over this, maybe then you will see things more clearly instead of through rose colored glassss.

[Giantxander]

Thanks for the reply. I know what you mean. I think that there is more to the story than I know to be honest. I think it has something to do with her parents wanting to move which would have became more difficult if she had moved out if you know what I'm saying. because before this it is all she wanted to do and the dog didn't matter. I think they planted the seed and kept watering it. Which makes me think why would I want to go back there, but its been 5 weeks now and for some reason I think that I still would.

[Clinton]

While you may have been happy in the relationship she wasn't. Happy contented people don't dump their boyfriends. She was in all likelihood thinking of this for a long time before she pulled the trigger. It happens a lot, people get blind sided.

 

Heal and move on. If she actually wants to talk, she knows where to find you.

[Movingforward3]

And in the end, it may have nothing to do with you. She is the unhappy one. And no one can fix unhappiness, except the unhappy person. Have fun with the dog and keep moving forward!

 

No one can ever love you like your dog does!